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Philippine Law Firm

Art. 45 of The Family Code of the Philippines states 6 grounds by which the court can annul a marriage.

1. Absence of Parental Consent. A marriage was solemnized and one or the other party was eighteen (18) years of age or over but below twenty-one (21) and consent was not given by the parents, guardian or person having substitute parental authority. The Petition of Annulment must be filed within five (5) years of having attained the age twenty-one. However, if the parties freely cohabited with the other as husband and wife after having reached the age of twenty-one (21) a Petition of Annulment can no longer be filed.

2. Mental Illness. One or the either party was of unsound mind at the moment of the marriage. But if the parties freely cohabited with each other after he or she came to reason the law prohibits the filing of a Petition.

3. Fraud. That the consent of either party was obtained by fraud, unless such party once having knowledge of the fraud freely cohabited with the other as husband and wife. The petition must be filed within five (5) of finding out the facts of the fraud.

4. That the consent of either party was obtained by force, intimidation or undue influence. Except when the same has ceased and the party filing the petition freely cohabited with the other as husband and wife. The injured party must file within five (5) years from the point in time the force, intimidation or undue influence disappeared or came to an end.

5. One or the other party was physically incapable of consummating the marriage, and such incapacity continues and appears to be incurable. The filing of the Petition of Annulment must be filed within five (5) years after the marriage.

6. Either party was at the time of marriage afflicted with a sexually-transmitted-disease (STD) found to be serious and seems to be incurable. This may also constitute fraud. The filing of the Petition of Annulment must be filed within five (5) years after the marriage.

SEPARATION: being separated from your spouse with or without communication is not grounds for annulment. It does not matter how many years you are separated. There is no law that annuls or voids a marriage automatically. Only a judge in a court of law can annul, void or nullify a marriage.

We file petitions for annulments only in Metro Manila.

can i used ABONDON to file an annulment?

and what case can i used if i was merried only because iam pregnant…and he was plan before to abort my baby…and after almost 1 year of our merried he was not comeback in our house. And his family now was told me that they will get my daughter….did they have a right to do it? and i have my boyfriend at this time.

Ana, Abandonment is not grounds for annulment in the Philippines.

i got married in 1982, my wife was then 16 yrs old? is there a legal basis for me to file for my marriage to be declared null & void?

Arnelious, Art 35. of The Family Code of the Philippines: The following marriages shall be void from the beginning (1) Those contracted by any party below 18 years if age even with the consent of the parents or guardians.

Hi, I was married june 2002 before I’ve gone to work in abroad then came back to philippines at september 2003 and found out that we cannot live together because of me being unemployed for some months and we have separated since april 2004, but did not file an annullment due to financial problems. So now I wanted to settle things over so that both of us can re-marry to someone else. What can I do to annul our marriage since I do not know the whereabouts of my ex? I just found out they have moved to another place, and I know for sure she does not want to see me forever.

If a Philippino husbands leaves his wife and children for another woman, how does she get the marriage annulled and what is the cost.

a friend(girl) was married when she was 17 yrs old. certificate of birth was fabricated to make her 18 at the time of marriage. thus this falls to nullity and void of marriage? if it is, what needs to be done to certify that the marriage is null and void?

Allann, Do you have proof that the birth certificate is a forgery? Also, there are other criteria to take into account to to see if the marriage is voidable.

Does the cucubinage or adultery may considered as grounds for annulment? what if more than 5 yrs of separation do i still have a chance to file for annulment?

Michelle, Concubinage and adultery are grounds for legal separation not for annulment.

Each person’s case is different from another persons’. To find out what is your best option for annulment, please contact us for a consultation.

i got married march 2001 but my husband left for US May 2001, i was 5 months pregnant then. since then he did not come home. August 2007 he stopped sending support. I heard that he has a new girl he met in a chat. I confirmed it when my son turns 7 last september 2008. He send a mobile with all the messages for that girl. and it also contains videos of the girl.

With this, i want to file an annulment, but unfortunately, i dont know how and where to start.

Analea, Please contact us for a consultation.

I was married since 2002 and gave birth 2003. Since the first month of our baby, my husband NEVER GIVES SUPPORT ON US. Although I never asked for it. But he never insisted an initiative to do so. With the help of my family (mom,brother and sister), I was able to raise our daughter. Is it possible to file annulment on this case? I mean he doesn’t even give single cent for the child.

Sandy, Non payment of support is not grounds for annulment or legal separation.

I was married since 2002 and gave birth 2003. Since the first month of our baby, my husband NEVER GIVES SUPPORT ON US. Although I never asked for it. But he never insisted an initiative to do so. With the help of my family (mom,brother and sister), I was able to raise our daughter. Is it possible to file annulment on this case? I mean he doesna€™t even give single cent for the child.

Sandy, Non payment of support is not grounds for annulment or legal separation.

*** If that is so, then what is the best thing for me to do, since I wanted to marry again to a more responsible person?

Sandy, Only the grounds as posted above can be used to file a petition for annulment.

my bf in the philippines is married but his wife filed for divorce in canada because she wants to marry another guy there. can my bf file for annulment so we can marry in the philippines and i can petition him here in the US?

Anna, was your boyfriends wife a Canadian or Filipino Citizen at the time of divorce?

If Filipino your boyfriend must file a petition for annulment if Canadian your BF can file a petition of recognition for foreign divorce.

my bf just got married on Dec. 2008, but he’s not leaving with the girl after they got married, instead, we are leaving together, i’m with him everyday until i moved here in Florida, just last month. he married the girl because of some other reasons, and i understand him. i believe him and trust him. we’re dating for a year and a month. we believed that we really love each other. his plan is to annul his marraige.

and we’re planning to get married in the middle of next year. I want to get marry with him so that i can petition him. now, my question is, can he file an annulment next year even if they just got married? their married is not working anyway and the girl also want to break up with him.

Vanez, your boyfriend may file for an annulment if the grounds exist.

i married my wife who is in US now last 2005. she met another guy there and filed a divorce 2007 and married this guy. she is not a US citizen yet. can i file for annulment so i can remarry again? if so, do i still have to inform my ex wife or do i still need some documents from her to sign as consent about the annulment? Needed your advice… thank you.

Blake, If the grounds exist you may file annulment. If the respondent can not be found in the

Philippines the summons will be published in such places as the court may order and by registered mail to the last known address. Any consent between the parties will be considered as evidence of collusion by the prosecutor and the case will be dismissed.

we got married city hall manila. we haven’t applied for a marriage license but we saw our marriage contract that there’s a licensed number and where it was released (cavite). and also in our marriage certificate that we got married in cavite and my husband’s address was in cavite but his address is in tandang sora, quezon city… now, were seperated for 9years… is there any grounds for annulment? tnx

Sharon, you should the records in Manila City Hall and the NSO and then consult with a lawyer.

can i file an annulment even we were separated for 5 years only or do i have to wait for another year? i already consult a lawyer but he declined the case ..

Angela, separation is not grounds for annulment. please read the article to see if one of grounds stated is pertinent to you.

just additional information on my case..we were married without marriage license last 2004 and signed only a papers then after a year we decided to end our marriage..can i still file declaration of nullity ??is it valid ??

Angela, check at the NSO to see if your marriage is registered and show the papers that you signed to a lawyer.

got a copy of my marriage certificate from NSO yet the lawyer advised me to wait till 6 years of marriage before filing the case because the sol.gen will surely reverse the decision of the court..but its almost 5 years now since we got married is it possible to pursue my annulment case??

Angela, I can not comment on what another lawyer advised you. If you wish you may contact our office for a consultation.

Is lying grounds for annulment? like giving the future wife assurance that the he is capable financially of raising family but the truth is he has nothing, no savings even single centavo & the rest of the family members have nothing also, not doing their responsibilty as parentjust waiting to receive money & only found out the situation after after marriage. At honeymoon stage the parent were asking to the son (newly married) to file loan without telling it to the wife (the newly married), asking the son to give money thousands just for application form a& to give IDs, employment contract just have seen the test message by the wife but the husband made it secret until found out. Is this grounds for annulment, this is one of the lies (to much lies).

Is violent acts, financial incapability, & dishonesty grounds for annulment? Thank you in advance for your reply soon.

Marie Mel, lying and dishonesty are not grounds for annulment on thier own, but could maybe be used as the base of a petition on the grounds psychological incapacity.

I left my husband with my intention of abandoning him because he has no means to support me and his child at all. I left since October 1998. i wanted that my marriage be annulled, what should i do & how should i do it?

Vilma, you must see what grounds for annulment are the most suitable for your case and consult with a lawyer to file the petition for annulment.

My ex-husband and I leave together for four years but like any other couple we experienced difficult time. Now, we are separated (not legally) 5 years with no communication at all. My brother told me that my ex-husband living with his girl and now have child with her. I wanted to file an annulment but am not sure on what ground or him having kid and living with his girl can use as a ground for filing an annulment? Awaiting for your reply.

Shiela, please email us if you would like a consultation on what grounds to file a petition for annulment.

My BF and me were together for three years. he was married before we met and after a year they separated (not legally) because the girl committed an adultery. they have 5 yrs old son and living with my BF family (we are working abroad at the moment)and now they are separated for more than 3 yrs. My BF wanted to file an annulment so that we can get married. What can be the ground for him to file an annulment? how long will it take and how about the child, can the mother take the child since she abandon the child and go with the guy. As far as I know the girl has her own family now (husband and with a child as well).

I really appreciate your legal advise. I have too many pressures regarding this.

Janet, your boyfriend would need to engage our services as lawyers for us to give him legal advice. One thing though your boyfriend will need to be present in court in the Philippines at the pretrial.

I was betrayed by my wife and found it out only after 4 years of marriage. It’s been nine years now and I am still hurt by that fact. It pains me everyday. Can I still have my marriage annulled?

She lied to me that is why I married her. I made a wrong decision into believing her that cost me a lifetime.

Rey, you may file a petition for annulment or legal separation if the grounds exist. Please read the other posts for details.

I got married last 2004 to a Fil-Am guy. It was mid last year when I found out that he wasn’t divorced until now when he married me here in Philippines. He made me believe from the very beginning that he was totally separated.

Could this be a ground for me to file for nullity of our marriage? Could damages be filed too?

Sammy, A bigamous marriage is void from the beginning and petition may be filed for nullity of marriage.

i’ve been married for morethan 1 year,when I applied for our marriage license she is not in the phil,she’s working,her sister pretend to be her then the license realease,she got home before our wedding day and after 10 days we’ve been sepparated again because i went here in japan to work until 2011(straight 3 years contract no vacation)and she also went back to her work,as of now we did’nt see each other for morethan 1 year,internet chat and phone calls is our way of communication,but most of the time were just argue each other,now I want to file an annulment,is there any legal ground for these?and if there is,what is that ground?more power and god bless!

Thank you for the reply. I wonder what are the papers I need to gather for filing the nullity of my marriage?

Could I claim damages too and could you pls give me an idea of how long and how much would this process cost me.

my bf is married with 5kids i know this is complicated but still wanted to know what can we use as grounds for annulment he wants to be with me but he’s afraid her wife will not allow him to see the kids in case she finds out that we’re together and we wanted to get married. he was my bf when i was 18 till 25 then i left the Philippines and I’m a (foreign citizen now) and she got pregnant and eventually marry her. then when i found out about it, i didn’t come back home till last year (7 years after)and we met again and only to found out that we’re still in love with each other, pls help me i want to be with him.

if ever we stay together can she use it to file a bigamy case for the both of us.

Pinky, bigamy is when a person marries twice. A woman living with a married man in the Philippines is concubinage. You should consult with a lawyer to see if there are any valid grounds for annulment. Email a Lawyer

We were married in the Philippines in 2000, then moved to the UK since 2002 and already acquired British citizenship. But things change and we decided to end the relationship. Divorce is legal in the UK, if this is granted, do you think our status in the Philippines (NSO) will also change to annulled or divorced? will i be allowed to marry somebody from the Philippines and apply for her fiance visa to come to the UK. Thanks.

Robert, what counts is your citizenship. Are you a dual national UK/Filipino or only a UK citizen.

My boyfriend was married 11years ago and separated for 9years now and had an 11 year old daughter living with her mom..but after two years of their marriage they separated, his wife went back to her family because she was caught to have another boyfriend. Since then they were not able to save their marriage and used to hate each other until now. My boyfriend is just giving financial support to her daughter. He want to file a petition of annulment..My question is is it possible for my boyfriend to file for a petition of annulment since we learned that 8years separation without contact is being recognized? Please advice us..God bless and more power.

Kriz, separation no matter how many years is not grounds for annulment.

Teresa, you may get a CENOMAR from the NSO

In addition to my statements…my husband was said to have previously married sometime in 1985 but I was not sure if it was registered or not and he had two children on that said marriage…could this be a ground for filling an annulment?

Rodelia, if your husband was already married when he married you; yes, you have grounds for annulment.

Follow up on my querries dated 28th of march. Currently, i am a UK citizen but planning to convert it to Dual nationality if needed. Do you think this will help or will be a problem on my case. Thanks. Your advise will be greatly appreciated.

I was married for 6 years. Within our marriage, I am the one working & taking the responsibility of my husband like providing financial support to our family. We have no kid. Within our marriage also, he has so many affairs with other women. Before, I gave him a chance but now I cannot tolerate it anymore because aside from being jobless, he is cheating with me by having an affair with another woman. And he is not capable to do his responsibilties in providing financial support.

Please advise me what to do because I have so many financial obligations to pay just because I’m the only one facing it. Until now, he is not helping me to pay those joint obligations.

Can I file any petition for a separation, or annullment?

Nidz, the article on this page gives you all the grounds for annulment provided by the law read here Grounds for Legal Separation

my ex- husband and i got married in the us 2001 and we went back here in manila can i file the divorce here since both us cannot go back to the us as of yet? we got seperated 2004 and he is married now here in manila since are marriage is not recorded here… what can i do .. please help..

Apple, a marriage obtained in a foreign country is valid in the Philippines even if it was not recorded. There is no divorce in the Philippines and a divorce obtained by Filipino citizens overseas will not be recognized in the Philippines.

I am jason married to a norwegian citizen last year but after a month of our wedding things changes she told me that we need to file our anulment because she dont love me anymore wherein she should file our divorce in norway but until to the present shes no where to found she just left me! what would be the best things to do? how can anulment work out without her! please advise me what to do sir?

Jason, the other party does not need to be present for an annulment to be filed. If the other party can not be found the court will order the publication of the petition in a newspaper.

kasal ana knakasama ko nuon sa provins pero naghiwalay sila ng malaman ng babae n my ibang babae ang asawa nya d2 sa manila,mahigit n 7 yrs n silang hiwalay ngayon at totaly walang communication..gusto na rin sana nming magpakasal pero kailangan muna nmin ipa annul yung una nyang kasal..ano ang aming gagawin. san ito dpat gawin,ilan taon ba proseso ng anullment at magkano ang magagastos. tnx

December 26 2002 me and my Boy friend got married in Manila City hall, I was 19 years old and my bf is 21 years old, we never apply for a marriage license and without the knowledge of our parents. We never live as husband and wife. Were just thinking that time that ita€™s just for our formality that we will never leave each other. 2004 I worked in UAE and we lost our communication and I heard that he already had a live in partner.

2006 I came back to the Philippines I requested a Cenomar for my Visa purpose but our marriage is legal.

If I file for the annulment how many percent chance that I will win the case?

Hi i married to US citizen january 2007 here in phil. caloocan city but after a months of our wedding things are change and no cominacation until now..i want to move on and freedom so iwant to file annulment but unfortunately dnt know how and where to start..and how much the coz of anulment? hope u help me to recomend a lawyer

My husband was cheating on me before we were married and continued to do so after we were married. I would never had married him if I knew he was cheating. Do I qualify for an anulment?

N.M., Infidelity is not grounds for annulment, it is grounds for legal separation.

I live in america and have meet a woman in the Philipines, she is going through the long drawn out annualment process. Many of her friends tell her she can come to America and marry me because its another country…… I told her I do not thinkt that would be legal and we would have visa problems once it was found out she was still married in the Philipines?? can she run off and marry me …she has a tourist visa by the way

James, once you are married your wife will apply for a green card. The investigation will show that she is already married in the Philippines and most probably deport her.

my husband promised me that he will take care of our kids (ages 5 and 3 )before i went to work abroad for our future he is just a labourer at that time and its impossible to support a family and provide education for our children after 4 months that i left he vanished and leave my kids to my sickly mother and from then we don’t know where he is i cannot do anything because i am out of the country working provide everything for almost 18 years i been re searching the internet for the ground of psychological incapacity because no father with the sound mind who will leave his small kids to anybody that he knows and take the responsiblity from their mother that he will take care of them. to be sure i try to get psychological evaluation and as of my statement and his relative statement the psychologist confirmed that he is suffering from Anti Social personality disorder co-exist with Narcissistic personality disorder which is incurable in nature is this a ground for annulment as the man is still proud that he has 2 wives and think he can get away with this i am not marrying anyone i just want justice, its easy to sue him for adultery but, i am thinking of his small kids from his new girl they are innocent and will be deprive from their needs if their father will be in jail and isang kasalanan ay indi maitutuwid ng isa pa i just want to cut the string from him thank you please advice

Lilia, you may file a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

my husband and i got married October 1996.we have been separated many times but his threatening me by using my two kids.last august i have decided to leave him permanently becoz his habitual alcoholism and not giving me money.but his threatening

me again that he will kill me.Is there any ground for annulment in such our case

Deborah, unfortunately violence is not grounds for annulment only legal separation.

About a year ago I met a wonderful woman online and we have become very close and want to get married in the US. She is a Philippino citizen. Her husband abandoned her and her 5 children 11 years ago and is now with another woman. Any suggestions on how we can get legally married and have her move to the US with me? 3 of her children have reached the age of majority and wish to stay in the philippines. I have read the article and understand that abandonment alone is not grounds for an annullment. Thanx for you time.

Hello, My husband and I are not living together anymore since 2002. We have 2 kids. He’s still working abroad and still doing a lot of extra-marital affairs. During the first year of separation (not legally), he didn’t support the kid’s needs and at times he gave me threat to follow his orders in exchange for support. I have tried so many times to make our marriage works but he refuses, and I thought his decisions were because of the woman he’s having an affair with. After 5 years from 2002, he told me that he will file for an annulment, in which I did not agree with him (for fear of losing the rights of my children). Can he file for an annulment although he’s the one having an affair? Can he use internet materials such as messages, emails, diskettes as proofs to go against me as the one being psychological incapacitated?

Right now, I do believe that he had possibly contracted a marriage in Saudi Arabia to be with this nurse there (also a filipina). The kids didn’t like what’s happening with us and didn’t want us to get separated. What can I possibly do? Thank you for your help. I do appreciate it a lot.

Didi, yes your husband can file an annulment but it will be the court who will decide if the grounds are valid and grant or not an annulment.

hi.i was married 2004 and separated with 2 husband before already have a pregnant live in partner. my boyfriend now also same situation as me.what is the grounds require for me if i need to file annulment?is there any. if not what is the legal way for me?pls advised..w/ thanks

Miles, contact us for a consultation to discuss which grounds for annulment may apply to your specific case.

good day. may i ask if you never submitted any documents for filling mrriage contract and the marrige license that you got is not from the city where you live and the pastor who initiated the ceremony is also not from there. is there any chance that, tht marriage is valid? can it be use as a ground for annulment?

i hope you will be able to give me some answers in this matter.

Mae, your marriage is valid.

We were married 2003 when my wife got pregnant by OTHER man in 2006. I never lived with her since then. We never had children nor any property. Can I file annulment for that ground?

Pete, infidelity is not grounds for annulment.

for instance, my husband beats me, is tihs a ground for Annulment? and suppose I am no longer happy with him as i Feel like i have no value or he is treating me like an idiot, is that a ground for annulment?

Skinny, violence is not grounds for annulment but you should contact the DWSD for help.

we never apply for a marriage licence when we got a secret married in manila. when i checked the marriage licence it is not belong to us its belong to some one else. we are separated for 5 years now. and we dont have a child either. but in NSO our marrige is valid

is there any chance to file an annulment so i will be a single again.

Lhars, your marriage is valid. You should consult with a lawyer to see if any grounds for annulment exist for your case.

been separated from my husband for 8 no communication whatsoever.I do not know where he is or f he is out of the country as he is an OFW.He previously had an affair and had a child with another woman.What if he is currently living with the same woman and child?Can I file for abandonment?annulment?

Anna, abandonment is grounds for legal separation. It is always best to consult a lawyer to discuss if grounds for annulment exist.

please advice also for one of my friend. he is also OFW for at least 4 years. they have 2 kids the elder is 11 and the youngest is 10 when he came back home to the philippines on 2008. his wife is 2 months pregnant to the other man.

is their any chance file an annulment? does he can take his kids from his wife so they will live here in uae with there father.

have a nice day,My friend is married last 1998 and she’s going abroad on 1999.Her husband have a job but he quit because he wanted to buy passenger car.He ask my friend to buy it since he quit his work already so,no choice.untill time came her husband always asking anything for her related to money.They have no house, they are living with parents of her husband.Till time came that my friend decide to separate him because she lost her hope for success in marriage.Her husband is so ugly really not good in personality and my friend is educated,beautiful,physically fit in everything.year 2,000 they are separated through verbal in which parents of guy never knows about it they keep it secret.Only the girl’s family knows the situation.They dont have child also, They are separated for 9yrs.If a girl will get marry to another guy without annulment is this a violation of Marriage Law?I heared 7yrs. of not living together,both have right to be with another relationship.Hope I can help her just to wait your answer.thanks and more power…

Yujin, separation no matter how long does not dissolve a marriage. Marriage to someone who is already married is called bigamy. Bigamy is a criminal offense.

Im now working here in abroad, my went to my wife’s house to visit, mother saw the guy hidding inside in our bedroom and nothing sexual happening, but my wife keeps on deniying that no one is there and she’s home alone, and there are hearsays and gossips that your wife have an affair with her distant cousin(3rd degree). would that be a ground for annulment. and we have a 2 kids.

Im working out of the country,

my mother informed me that one day she visited my wife’s house she found out that my wife had someone staying with her and my mother cheked the room she found out that someone is hiding from the room.

My wife is denying that she’s alone and no one is there.

At the same time neighbor’s have gossip that his cousin is staying & sleeping inside the house togethere.

What legal moves i can do?

Daniel, you may file a case for adultery.

will do, thanks! where can i contact your office for consultation?

I am married for almost 3 years now, but when i got married i was only 19 years old and my wife was 25 wife declared that her parents were deceased just to have marry me. but after marriage (in a municipal hall) we always fight. she went abroad to work there and she said she will support me. i found out that she just falsify her documents and she declared that she is single that is why i did not get any support from her, and beside from that i also found out that her parents still lives. i went to NSO to check if our marriage is valid and found out that it is. should there be a chance for me to file a petition for nullity of our marriage? would you help me in this situation? i would appreciate much your help regarding this legal concerns. thanks.

Rey, yes may file for annulment email us to if you want a consultation.

Thanks for the reply.too much appreciated..But what if her husband now have a child with other girl..According to my friend,she is happy if her husband commited with others since they are separated longer time..If she will file annulment to make things clear and both free, Is the court grant her wish.

just wanna ask, what if the marriage contract indicates that it took place at couples house with address and also noted that it was officiated by a certain reverend but I was told by one party that they dont know the address nor the reverend but confirmed that the marriage took place at manila city hall as civil marriage. i know that the catholic church does not allow marriages to take place out side of the church and also if its a civil one then a judge would be indicated in the contract, right? would it also be sufficient grounds?

Jimmy, if the marriage is registered it is considered valid. The parties should consult a lawyer to see if any grounds for annulment exist for their case.

my wife and i are no longer together for almost a year because of third party issue on her side, and now she admitted that she is using a illegal drugs, and she told me that the custody of our child will be on hers still because our child is illegitimate. We had conceived our child before our marriage and our child carries her lastname but I have signed on the birth certificate to certify that I acknowledge our child. Also before I go back to my work abroad last year I filed the legalities for my child’s name to carry my last name unfortunately I wasnt able to go back to the agency to pick up the neccessary documents to be filled in NSO. My question is can my wife loose the right or the custody of my child? and put my parents on the custody as the guardian of my kid, because I am working outside of the country.

Jason, very rarely do the courts remove custody from the mother for children below 7 years old.

I got married when I was 23 in 1991 without my parents consent. We didn’t live together as husband and wife as I left few months after we got married to work in Hongkong. We have very limited communication between me & my so called husband while I’m away. Then I met and fell in love with a western guy and we had a daughter in 1992 who is an Australian Citizen by decent, she is now 16. My western boyfriend sponsored me in 1994 and still living together. Can I file for an annulment as we have never live together and have never seen each other since 1991? I would appreciate if you could give me some advise. Thank you very much

Jhosie, you will have to study the different grounds for annulment and see which one fits your case. Not living with your husband is not grounds for annulment.

my husband and i got married in thailand..1996 and his annulment finalizes 1997 but we submitted our marriage contract sometime is 2002. is our married void/null? another thing..we renewed our vows 2007 here in the that means he is married to me legally?

Marissa, if your marriage is registered at the NSO and/or in the city where you married, you are married legally.

I am a widowed male. My wife passed in 2005. In 2007 I met my girlfriend. I found out that my girlfriend was married 8 months after we met. During those eight months we fell in love with each other. After I found out she was married she wanted an annulment which we pursued. After many months I learned that she had lost the annulment case and immediately after that I found out that she had been found guilty of bigemy and sentensed to five years prison. She spent a few months in prison and during that time we paid the fine of 5,000,000php. I also researched and found that bigemy can only be construed that both parties are legally married in two marriages. Since there was only one of us married is there any recourse we could take against the courts to regain the 5 million fine and any damages> Can she get legally seperated from her abusive husband which she no longer loves and they do not carry on marriage duties?.

Jack, only one spouse has to married for there to be bigamy. Your girlfriend has to file a petition for annulment to dissolve her marriage. By the way, Php 5,000,000.00 is way too much for a fine for bigamy are you sure that are not too many zeroes.

just want to ask what legal action can i do to my case. My husband left us and have another wife and daughter in province. He abandon us for almost 4 years. Me and my son didnt receive any financial support since he left us.wat legal action can i have for this case.

kinasal po kmi ng gf ko last feb 14 2009 after one month we got separated. ikinasal po kmi ng pastor. alam ko pong iknasal na sya last 2007 pero nilakad po para maikasal kami. is my marriage to my gf valid. even if her first marriage was valid.

Kriz, your marriage is not valid as a person can only be married to one person at a time. Because your marriage is registered you will still have to file a petition for annulment before the Regional Trial Court to dissolve your marriage.

my mother in law informed me that my husband is having a gf in philippines while im working in abroad but my husband denying his mothera€™s statement. When im with my husband here in abroad i saw a text message in his roaming cellphone coming from his alleged gf. I called my mother in law asking if mheann is gfa€™s name of husband which i saw in his mobile and she said yesa€¦ I called this gf thru overseas call but denying the fact and i found out that during my husband vacation in the philippines he was seeking a legal advice from his gfa€™s friend which is a lawyer about having annulment with mea€¦ i texted my husband about this but he said that this lawyer is that gf bf which i know is not truea€¦ im planning to go to philippines to seek a legal advice and what legal action i have to do since my mother in law is saying that my husband is having a third partya€¦

Anne, first of all you should decide if you want your marriage to continue or not. Then decide if you want to oppose the petition of annulment that your husband wants to file. You may file charges of concubinage against your husband if you have witnesses.

Good day. My husband and i were married for four years now but before that he already has a child with his ex-gf. We are not lucky to have a child of our own. His ex-gf told me that our marriage is not valid for we dont have a child yet. Does she has a right to file for annulment of our marriage? Even if my husband and i are happy living together.

Michelle, the ex girlfriend does not file for annulment for you or your husband. Not having a child is not grounds for annulment.

how about my situation my wife has a mental illness.they keep for me that secret and also we stay together only 4months then her behavior is already go back in her mental illness,they only told only that she is sick but my mother she bring this girl or my wife into hospital she found that this girl has already admitted there in a psychiatry.what can i do?i want to annul my marriage?but how?

Eric, you may file a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

i got married when i was 21 w/o a consent frm my father only frm my mother.after 7yrs.of being married we dont have child.then i found out that my wife has another man.i broke with her and she’s now living w/ his there any chances 2 file 4 annulment?

Jao, infidelity is not grounds for annulment. You may want to try filing an annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

my husband and I living together for 6 yrs,we had 1 son. but last year we got married and filed my son as eligitimate child coz we already married. but now unfortunately i found out that my husband is bisexual, im planning to leave him, what legal action should I do? annulment or legal separation? does my child still legitimated if i file for a legal separation or annullment? thanks

Edzzy, annulment will allow you to remarry. Legal separation will not allow you to remarry in the future. Your child stays legitimate in the eyes of the law no matter what you choose to do.

My situation is pretty complicated and I need some decent advice. I was married in a municipal by a mayor 4 days after arriving in Philippines. I have no idea if it is valid though I received a marriage cert on the very same day. This happened 2 years back.

I have not been to see her since then as we have had marital problems ever since.

Is this marriage void? If not, can I file for an annulment? I am Singaporean. And I have not endorsed it in Singapore.

I met someone last year and got married to her in Singapore. My first partner knows about it but doesn’t know what to do as she is worried that there might be some complications arising from this situation.

I met someone here and in my haste, I got

Gerald, you should file a petition for annulment in the Philippines immediately. You are open to charges of bigamy and concubinage in the Philippines.

i am married since 1987, and separated but with a good communication…. my question is my husband got married in Hong Kong.. (unknown dates)… is their marriage valid?? and how come the other woman using my husband’s name??

follow up with my questiona€¦ a source told me that they registered their marriage in the Philippine Consulate Hongkong and she was able to obtain a passport using my husbanda€™s namea€¦. can i file a bigamy or concubinage, does it cause them for deportation if ever?

Ybur, a person who marries a second without having their first marriage annulled, can be charged with bigamy. A person can only be married to one person at a time, therefore the second marriage is not valid.

marrying outside the Philippines with someone who is already married here in the Philippines can be still a bigamy?

Our marriage license was filed in different city by a relative. Will it affect the validity of my marriage or can i get my marriage annulled?

Mei, your marriage is still valid you will have to choose other grounds to file a petition for annulment of marriage.

Thank you for your reply. Should I file for an annulment, what kind of documents should I need from Singapore? Is there a way to annul my 1st marriage without getting being charged with bigamy?

Is my 1st marriage valid based on my earlier comment posted?

And i didn’t register my 1st marriage from Philippine in Singapore and I didn’t register my 2nd marriage from Singapore in Philippines. Will that help me prevent any charges of Bigamy?

i got married in the philippines and my supposed to be wife went abroad after 20 days and never came back. we were not even able to leave together in the same house. after about 6 months i recieved divorce letters from her and her attorney and then the last i heard is she got married. it has been 8 years since and i never heard from her. can i file for an annulment?

John, you do not need to file for an annulment. You may file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce.

thanks for the answer… now, i can file a case if i can secure a record of their marriage from NSO.. can i also file a falsification of documents with the alleged second wife who is using my husband’s name and was able to obtain passport and left the country?

Can i file for an annulment even if 2 months p lng kming kasal?

Jhen, you may file for annulment if the grounds exist.

Sir I was married at the age of 18 and I forged my mom’s signature. We lived together for almost 7 years but until now my husband doesnt have work to support us.He’s 25 years old now and have a habitual alcoholism that sometimes lead us for a violent fight. I forged my mom’s signature for me to get married at the age of 18. What grounds should I file for an annulment?

Pamela, you need to have a consultation with a lawyer to see what grounds to choose for your petition for annulment.

We were living-in together for 3 years wen we got married, we didnt secure marriage license because we used the article 34..we got marry wen I was 9 months pregnant. we are seperated juz last year. Now he is questioning the legality of our marriage coz he is living-in with other woman.can I stil sue them for concubinage?can he used this as a ground for annulment?

Cher, infidelity is not grounds for annulment. Infidelity is gounds for legal separation. You can sue your husband for concubinage if you are able to provide proof.

i am married for 7 yrs with 3 kids, within that years of marriage my husband didn’t have any work, he is very irresponsible no financial support coming from him i am solely earning for the family.also he used to hurt me physically and emotionally even to my kids. year Jan. 2006 he got motor accident resulting confinement of more than 4 months within that period i decided to leave my husband because of his family they also became burden on my part and knowing that he cannot have a chance to perform his obligation of supporting the needs his own family . now we been separated for about 3 yrs. would that be enough grounds for annulment.

my boyfriend got married last may 2005 and separated not legally for more than 3 years now, my bf wants to marry me, is there any grounds for annulment since his wife wants their marriage to be annulled too?…waiting for your reply..Thanks and God bless

Jimilisa. they may examine psychological incapacity as the grounds for annulment.

Can we file a bigamy to the person who marries a married person…. If the other woman knows that the man is married and still marries the married man, can we file a two different cases, one for the husband and another for the woman who marries the guy? Pede din bang humingi ng danyos sa babae?

Hi there. My mom, who is residing in Canada, is a very conservative and religious woman. At 2005, I joined her with my son as an immigrant. I was a single mother. A year after I arrived in Canada (2006), I was pressured to marry my not so serious boyfriend in the Philippines. He is not the father of my son. 10 days after the marriage I went back here in Canada. I never declared here that I was married. I was not willing to marry the guy. I went back Jan. 2009 to visit my husband and tried to convince myself about preserving the is my biggest fear to be disowned by my family. Still, I want our marriage annulled, eversince. Also, he is financially dependent on me. Will my case be qualified for annulment? Do I need to go back to the Philippines for the process? Please help. It’s been three years of my life that just a waste… Thank you very much in advance.

MASP, you need to come to the Philippines to attend the pretrial if not the fiscal will dismiss the case.

i need some advise i want my marriage annuled..iam married for almost 26 years but am staying in japan for 15 years my husband is in the philippines and is having his new family he has 2 kids 12yrs. and 1 yr. old i ask him to file for annulment but he ignore can i file i file the annulment while am here in japan with out going back to the philippines.

jen-ai, you must come to the Philippines to start the process.

If infedelity is not a ground for annulment, what other ground/grounds can I use? What if I charge her Adultery for having a child with other man?

Thanks and looking forward to your response.

Pete, you have the option of filing a case for adultery. Legal separation does not allow you to remarry. You may want to explore annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

A lady I meet in the Philippines is going through an annualment. The case has went to court, the judge has heard the testimony, the last court date being May 2008. The husband is NOT contesting the case and yet their has been no decision one way or the other–it has been a year now. Is this typical for it to take this long just to render a decision.

i am married for 3 yrs now but only live with my wife for 3mos & left the country. we have misunderstandings & finally decided we dont want to live together anymore.since there is no grounds for annulment can i file a divorce from another country & re-marry?thank u!

Jen, as a Filipino citizen you can not obtain a divorce in another country and even if you do you will not be able to file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce. A Filipino citizen may only file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce if his/her spouse is a foreign citizen and obtains a divorce overseas.

Could u please give me an idea where can i file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce? thank u for ur help!

Jen, the petition must be filed at the Regional Trial Court. You should hire a lawyer to to assist you. There will be court hearings.

Hi! I got married when I was 18 and my wife was 20 since she was pregnant. I went to work for two years after getting married (sometime 2001). While abroad, I realized that things weren’t working out between us so I seldom, called, wrote her. When I got home, I learned that she was with child from another man. Is this grounds for adultery and for filing of Annulment?

Dirzzt, infidelity is not grounds for annulment. You may consult a lawyer for the adultery charges to see if you have a case.

my girlfriend is separated from her husband for 6 years with out communication and no finacial support(not legally separated)..she’s got 2 kids and right now,we’re living together for almost 3 years in a same my question is:”do we have the opportunity to get marry?”if not,what is the best way to void her marriage since,she was abandoned by her husband for 6 years with-out communication and financial support. bongskie

Bhongskie, your gf has to file a petition for annulment.Consult a lawyer to decide what are the best grounds to use.

As you mentioned to the case of Jen, does it mean that if I avail my Canadian citizenship as single, I can file the divorce here in Canada? Then my marriage in the Philippines will be null and void?

a€?does it mean that if I avail my Canadian Citizenship as MARRIEDa€?a€¦

MASP, your Canadian divorce will not be recognized in the Philippines. You can not remarry in the Philippines. If you do remarry anywhere and come to the Philippines your wife may file charges against you for bigamy and concubinage. The remedy is, once you obtain your divorce is to file a petition for recognition of a foreign judgment in the Philippines.

My husband is a foreigner, we met in the net and after 6 months he visited here in the PI and we got married in civil. We have a lot of incompatibilities and he always hurt me emotionally, throwing my things out the house or yell at me in the public. Is there anything I could do to help me out from this marriage. How?

Chel, you may examine filing a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

How long does it take for an annulment? Can I secure a divorce from his country and file for petition of recognition here in the PI? Is it possible? If it is, how long should I wait for a petition to be granted, would it take a year?

I wonder why I can not get a response or an opinion for my inquiry on May 7th. I simply wanted to know how long it takes, typically, for a judge to render a decision after all the trial dates have been completed in a Philippine annaulment case?? Her case went to trial last may of 2008 and as of one year later no decision has been made. Is this the norm??

James, there is no typical time for a judge to render a decision for an annulment only an estimate and that depends on too many things to to mention here. Some cases take years. You should talk to the lawyer who is handling the case to find out its status and what may be the reason why there is no decision.

Hi. Just want to ask if the a marriage declared null (void in the first place) will be taken out of the Civil Registry records? The court granted the decision last 2005 but when I applied for a CENOMAR, the marriage is still in the books. NSO only gave me an annotated Marriage Contract.

Will the marriage still be part of the records or it just really takes time for them to erase. Part of the decision is to cancel the entries in the book of marriages.

Marli, even though the court granted the decision someone must go to the civil registrar and NSO to make the changes the court does not do it.

Please give me advice. My bf is married and his wife is in abroad and they have been separated for 3 years. And now i got pregnant. How long does an annulment with this kind of case go? Does the respondent need to sign anything? What is the role of the respondent in cases of annulment procedures? What if she does not agree with the annulment?

Pearl, there is no exact time that an annulment takes. Especially if your boyfriends wife contests the case. Separation is not grounds for annulment.

My husband is a British citizen and is filing for divorce in the UK. We got married in the Philippines. Is divorce grounds for annulment?

Motoko, divorce is not grounds for annulment. What you can do is file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce.

My sister is living now and have 6 children from a married man. Her known to be husband verbally, was physically separated from his wife before my sister and him decided to live together. It’s been 13 yrs. that there been together. Is there anyway for them to be husband and wife legally? I want to help my sister for the sake of her 6 children.

Thank you! Your advice will highly be appreaciated. God bless.

Iyah, the married man will have to file a petiton for annulment.

Me and my husband got married last August of 2007. By then, we learned that the legal age to be married for either party would be 25. Back then, my husband was 22, but I was 28. We got an agency who’ll let us get married without the usual seminars preluding a wedding. And they also agreed to forge the signatures of his parents for the Parental Consent part. It was, and still, a “secret marriage”, since both sets of parents (his and mine) have no idea that we have gotten married, and we’re still living separately. To make it short, we’re married, but to other people, we’re still boyfriend/girlfriend. Is our marriage valid? If so, would there be any chance that either one of us can file for annulment should our marriage didn’t work?

Shelly, first of all if everything is fine between you and your husband why are you asking about annulment? Second, some grounds for annulment have a prescription period so it all depends on the grounds, how long you have been married and how long you have lived together. So to answer your question without knowing the grounds and other details it is impossible to answer your question.

I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend since 1997. We got married in March 2004. During that time, my husband was a US green card holder. We paid 10k so we can get our marriage contract immediately. A Reverend conducted the marriage rites and my husband left for the US the next day. We never saw our marriage license but there was a license number written on the marriage contract. Our marriage is registered with the NSO. A few months aftr the marriage, my husband became a US citizen. Around June 2004, I found out that my husband got another girl pregnant in the US. I wanted to end the marriage after I found out about it, but he begged me and promised me that he would end his affair with the other girl. I gave him another chance and tried to work out the marriage. Last June 2008, i arrived in the US because of his spousal petition. When i got here in the US however, I found out that he has been lying to me the whole time. I found out that he still had an affair with the woman whom he had a son. I have filed for a divorce here in the US. But he wants to file for annulment there in the Philippines because he wants to revoke my green card here in the US. We have been married for more than 5 years now. What are the possible grounds for annulment in our case? Thanks

Cherubim, you have to consult an American lawyer as this concerns your green card.

I just want to know,I`m a filipino citizen married to american.He don`t divorce me for some reason.I have read some laws in his states that I can file the divorce through his residency and I hired a lawyer to do for me.Now I am divorced.I want to get marry with my new bf and they said I cannot get marry after 10 mos. and 1 day.Do the philippine law recognized the divorce even if I was the one who filed it?Do I have to file an annulment even if I`m already divorced?How long will be the process if I file for annulment coz I heard if it`s annuled I can get marry faster and dont have to wait 10 mos.And by what grounds would it be?Thanks and more power to you.

Kim, as you are a Filipino citizen and filed for the divorce your divorce will never be recognized in the Philippines. You will have to file a petition for annulment for your marriage to be dissolved in the Philippines.

I’m married to my husband for 25 years but physically separated for 12 years.I want to get married to a foreigner,what should I do in order to remarry?

i found out about the adultery of my husband and the girl just gave birth and the father of the child is my husband.

how can i file?what are process for filing?

Karen, infidelity is not grounds for annulment.

my husband and i get separated for domestic voilent. we both live in the uk and our 2 grown up children.we got marreid in the philippines, my husband got marreid in the uk but we are still legally marreid . we separated for 9 years now . please do help me i want to get own with my life but im frightend and dont know what to do . hi is now happy and got two children . i creid almost every night .iv been approach for marraged but i refused becouse im still marreid .please help me….

Juanita, if you want to get married again you must obtain an annulment.

I would like to know if CENOMAR is effective proof that my husband is married thrice and I am the original one.

We have been separated since year 1995 and I just found out recently his second marriage happened in 1995.

Thank you and more power.

Jazmine, you may also check with the NSO and the local civil registrar where you were married if your husband obtained an annulment.

Is forced confinement and battery grounds for annulment? Just helping a friend.

my husband got a second wife can i use this as a grounds for annulment?

i secure 2 marriage certificate from NSO, mine & the other wife

Hi, it’s me again. I wrote about a week ago (May 21)and asked you about my situation. Like I said before, we were married since AUGUST of 2007. We HAVE NOT lived together eversince because nobody knows (especially both sets of parents) that we ARE married, save for a few very close friends.So, I guess to answer your question back, we are married for a year and a half now, but HAVE NOT LIVED TOGETHER EVERSINCE. I am just asking whether this can be grounds for annulment (the forgery of his parents’ signature for the parental consent part, not living together eversince getting married, etc). You also asked me if my husband and I are getting along, why am I asking about annulment. I wouldn’t be asking these questions if we ARE getting along. Like most couples, we are having problems, but most of them can’t be worked out anymore. We tried, but unfortunately, didn’t succeed. I already read enough from your answers about other people’s inquiries, such as infidelity is not grounds for annulment, etc, but I am wondering if “irreconcilable differences” are. And if not, I’m banking on the falsification of the parental consent on his part. I am looking forward to your answer once again. Thank you.

my live-in partner and myself would like to get married.

he, however, has a marriage issue. the timeline are as follows and quite different from the rest of the comments posted:

1. both him and his ex-spouse got married in the philippines in the late-80’s. both were philippine nationals.

2. they moved to the u.s. for good in the early 90’s and got divorced there in the mid-90’s. still both were philippine nationals.

3. they acquired u.s. citizenship thereafter and did NOT acquired DUAL citizenship up to present.

4. my live-in partner moved back here in the philippines in the late 00’s and will be staying here for good.

5. should he obtain recognition of foreign judgement or annulment?

thank you very much. your response is greatly appreciated.

Shirley, your live-in partner is still married under Philippine law. He must file a petition for recognition of a foreign judgment to be able to remarry.

My mom and my dad were separated, though not legally. The cause of their separation is concubinage (which will be a strong ground for legal separation) but my mom wants her marriage to be annulled. what shall we do?

just a question… kung separated na po ba ang isang lalaki for one year, and he found a new girl. pede pa rin ba xa kasuhan ng adultery o concubinage?

Jenn, the length of separation does not matter. What matters is if the man is married or not.

Hi, I wanted to give my friend a good advice. Here’s her story..

She got pregnant by her so called bf (but the guy doesn’t love her anymore) because she said that all she wanted is to have a child with him and she said that she would never bother him after that. But instead, she used her situation to let him marry her.

They got married civil jan2009. And she gave birth this june2009.

I think the guy is just doing his duties as a father to their baby. And I heard that the guy just gave his father a favor for marrying my friend because they where together for 5yrs (just boyfriend-girlfriend not lived in partners), and that my friends family and his family to stay in a good relationship since they’ve been a good neighbors in the province. Her relatives got angry with the guy when they found out that they broke up last year(before she got pregnant), that was like early 2008.

Now she’s worried, can the guy filed for annulment already just after giving birth? And just after 4mos of marriage?

Miss, an annulment can be filed at anytime even the day after the marriage. Pikot is not grounds for annulment.

me & my husband were married in a different city w/c none of us resides in or even born in. i wrote a different address in the marriage license (a borrowed address from someone in the city where we’re married), plus we never attended seminars & any formality of such. i also found out that he had a 2 or 3 month affair abroad during the time he’s working there. & even when he came back here, he is constantly chatting w/ girls for hire. is it a ground for nullification of our marriage? thanks for your reply.

I was married to a man from England in April 2007 and we live together for six months. He went back to England and never came back. Can I file for annulment so I can remarry? I have an american boyfriend right now.

Leda, if the grounds exist you may file a petition for annulment.

what does deactivated with question mark in divorce case mean? for example: date and time – deactivated?

Arianne, there is no divorce in the Philippines. You will have to ask an attorney from the country where the divorce is being heard in court.

I wanted to know if there’s a possible solution to my problem. Im 41 yrs old. I had 2 marriages: the first was in 1992, i got separated and had no child. Then i re-married in 2001 without filling nullity of the 1st marriage. Now, im planning to marry my american boyfried, please help me resolve my problems on my previous marriages. Thanks so much for ur assistance.

Maria Christina, you will have to annul the 2 marriages if you wish to marry your American boyfriend.

Hello again, i want to know if my second marriage is valid, if not… it’s the first marriage that i should file an annulment? Thanks for enlightening me. God Bless.

i am 5 years now and have a daughter living with me. my husband and i got separated(not legally) for almost 3 years. i’ve been quiet for years and dont want to communicate with him even get support for our daughter! a friend of mine who’s neighbor of my husband told me that his already living with other woman now even he know that he’s still married with me! in this case can i file an annulment?

Christine, infidelity is not grounds for annulment but there are other grounds that you may us.

My bf is married to other girl for 11 years they have 2 kids (both not in legal age)they got married in dubai, now at this moment their marriage is not working anymore as they the wife left him for more than a year now. before the girl left, they were not in a good realtionship already for almost 2 years. now my bf wants to marry me,can we make it possible?what are the requirements does my bf need to obtain, in order for him to file the legal separation or annulment legaly. thanks in advance for your reply.

Red, your boyfriend must obtain an annulment of his marriage in the Philippines before he can marry you.

is separation, meaning not living together of married couple, for more than 5 years can be a ground for legal separation or to be specific,can be automatically called legally separated?

Bitter, there is no such thing as automatic legally separated. To be legally separated a judge must isssue a court decree. Abandonment without justifiable cause for more than one year may be a grounds of legal separation.

I got two (2) marriage licenses. Each one from diferrent woman. One in 1998, and the other is in 2000. All are registered in NSO. I left the woman whom I married second and I return back to the woman I married first in 1998. However, our marriage license in 1998 was registered late (2008). Which marriage is null and void? Hoping for an answer. Thanks.

Hill, the first marriage is the valid one. Even though the second marriage is null and void from the beginning there is still a need to have a judge issue a decree of annulment.

My girlfriend is a Filippine citizen. Her still current husband is an American. The marriage was Filippine. They’ve been separated now for about 3 yrs. Can my girlfriend file for divorce or annulment in the US and if so, will it be recognized in the Filippines?

Tim, Filipinos citizens may not obtain a divorce anywhere in the world. Filipino citizens may only obtain a divorce in the Philippines.

I wish to marry a filapina woman who has a child but has never lived with her husband once he found out she was pregnant. She never had the consent of her parents, which i know is grounds for annulment . However his birth certificate show he was registered mistakenly at birth as a FEMALE. Does this make the marriage illegal anyway with having to get it annuled

good am, i was married to a Japanese year 2006, it was a marriage for convenience to work in Japan and we didnt live together even for 1 day as he is not my boyfriend. but he did not apply my visa in Japan and never seen him nor heard from him since then. I remained married here and cant move on with my life and remarry, what annulment case should i file and how much will it cost?

can i file an annualment for that?? he abandon us for 4 years and right now he have a daughter to his girlfrend in province. In this case can i file a petition for annualment and what grounds do i need to file. Thanks and God bless you

I was quickly married 1999, don’t remember applying for marriage license. It was solemnized in Manila but not sure if the solemnizing officer was legitimate. We got married Dec 1999 then abandoned me Jan2000 after my still birth. I was not sure if the marriage has been legally registered. In 2004 i requested and received a CENOMAR. Relying on this certificate i married my boyfriend September 2004. I have since learned that the previous marriage had been registered but not with direct name. What can i do to void the first marriage?

Mikadel, a person who is legally married may file a petition for annulment to ask the court to annul their marriage.

Just want to clarify if i will annul the first marriage? How about my second marriage, is it legal?

Mikadel, a person who is already married can not marry again unless the first marriage has been annulled. A second marriage is null and invalid from the beginning if the first marriage has not been annulled. The second marriage must also be annulled by a judge.

i was married to a foreigner last june 2007 under coercion of my mother. I was 22 then,. we did not consummate the marriage since i refuse to sleep with the guy.He went back to the US and came back Dec. 2007 after which i left him and never came back and i never heard from him. Until last january 2009 that he has already found a girl in Dipolog.He filed for annulment in the US, i don’t know why he did, knowing we were married here in the Phil. A lawyer friend of mine said that I am entitled to 50% of his property since he refused to have a pre-nup agreement before we got married. And if i convince him to file annulment here in Phil. what are the chances that his petition may be granted? Thanks!

Dawn, if this person has already filed for annulment/divorce in US and has obtained it, there is no need for him to have another annulment in the Philippines. Only Filipino citizens must obtain an annulment in the Philippines. You, however must file a petition for recognition of foreign judgment to have your status changed to single.

Ok thank you. In order for me to file a petition for recognition of foreign jugdment, what are the requirements needed for it?Do i need a copy of the court order from him? Thank you so much for the informations.

My husband filed for presumptive death fr her ex wife in 2004 & was granted and we were able to remarry in 2008.Im already a US citizen and he was denied by US embassy since it isnt honored by US.Would our marriage be null and void since he knew that his ex is just abroad and have family too? or since our marriage is not working coz of indifferences,could i file a divorce against him?

Kikat, if your husband’s ex-wife would appear in court and file an affidavit showing that she is alive, your marriage would annuled. As an American you may file a divorce in the USA but if you want your records changed in the Philippines after the divorce you will have to file a petition for recognition of foreign judgment.

Sir is it possible for a filed annulment be approved without the consent of my wife, her family and our children as well? Provided that I have reasonable grounds for anullment, is my wife’s consent and signature needed for the filing and approvement of our annulment?

John, it is the judge who decides to issue a decree of annulment or not based on the statements presented by each party during the trial. If one spouse does not attend the hearings in court to defend their position it is up to them but the case will still continue.

The spelling of name of my wife was mistakenly written in our marriage contract, Is our marriage null and void? thank you.

Frank, a spelling mistake does not make a marriage null and void.

and I meet my friend ( used to know each othere when we was young. He was married. A shot gun married. ( She’s pregnant). When they have 2 kids. She applied for working abroad ( Wife) She’s been away for 16 years. She only came and visit the family 3 times for 16 years. The husband raised the 2 daughter which 20 years old annd 16 years old. He wants to file a petition to annulle the marriages. However

depending on the circumstances, may be enough to ask the court for a declaration of presumptive of the “absent spouse”, in which case the petioner may again re-marry.

Monica, presumptive death as a way to remarry is risky. There must be good reasons for presumptive death such as the person being in a dangerous place such as a war zone. If the presumed dead person reappears the second marriage will be annulled. It would be much better to obtain an annulment based on psychological incapacity.

What will happen if me and my husband have no contact or communication over 10 years now. We also have our own family now. He has his new family and so do I. I dont know if he marry again but I marry a foreign man. We dont have anymore concern to each other but what will happen , legally speaking

Arlene, a person who is married can not marry a second time without having their first marriage annulled. A second marriage is bigamous and is not valid.

My partner and his ex-wife has been separated for almost 15 years now. She filed an annulment case last 2005 on ground of being underage at the time they got married. She got married abroad and have children now and have no intention of going back here in the Philippines or to continue the case. Can my partner file for annulment now without her being present, so we could get married?

Carla Grace, if the ex-wife already filed an annulment you should check if the annulment decree was already issued.

I was married in 1980 in Philippines. I was a US citizen, my wife was a Philippine citizen. In 1984 we moved back to the US. In 1994 my wife obtained US citizenship. We now are getting a divorce.

If I want to marry in the Philippines in the future, do I need to do anything besides file a petition for recognition of foreign judgment?

is a joint petition for divorce here in Canada will recognized in the Philippines? Im a permanent resident in Canada and married with Canadian citizen in the Philippines last year 2008. Thanks a lot.

Janna, a joint petition for divorce in Canada will not be recognized in the Philippines.

hi i got married here in us last 06 cause i got here based on fiancee visa and to be able to stay here i need to be married in 90 days,since then our married is not working at all we argue all the time too many differences in life right now im a us resident and i want to end this marriage and go back to philippines am i allowed to file annulment there in the philippines for my us citizen husband here in states?

Eds, yes, you may file for an annulment in the Philippines.

hi! I had a secret marriage last 2008, I was 23 that time and we got married even without the consent from my parents. Is it ground for annulment?

My partner and I been separated for 8 years ..I am working here at Dubai we agreed to make it legally..would it be possible to annul the marriage in the absence of other the moment he and my daughter is living with other woman with my blessing..what is difference of legal separation and annulment.would it both allow you to re-marry again?

Janet, legal separation does not allow a person to remarry. Once a person has obtained they may remarry.

My boyfriend and his wife are living in separate lives for 7 years now…She left him and their daughter (that time was 4 yrs old) because of misunderstanding, he tried to patch up their marriage for 2 years (even went to the place of his wife to win her back) but she did not cooperate…she still have communication with her daughter through the sister of my boyfriend…Now, he wanted to marry me and make our relationship legal…what is the first step that he will do for filing an annulment? What will be his ground for filing it…Please help. Thank you very much!

Innocent, have your friend contact us for a consultation.

what are the requerments to file a petition for recognition of foriegn judgement?

1 – The divorce must be filed by the non Filipino spouse.

2 – Certified copy of the divorce by the Philippine Embassy//Consulate

i got married secretly in the philippines and separated. i filed for an anulment for the grounds of psychological incapacity but was denied. i filed for a divorce when i got here in the u.s.when i was still a greencard holder and was approved. now, i am a u.s citizen, i want to marry a u.s. citizen. is that possible? if not, can i file for another anulment?

Yaya, you may marry in the US but it will not be recognized as Filipino citizen may not obtain a divorce in any country. You can not file for another annulment as the first was denied. Your first husband may file for annulment in the Philippines.

my partner and i got married on 2001 and we separated on 2007. we have one child. the reason of separation was that my partner was forced by her mother to marry (she was pregnant that time). another reason i found out that there was a third party involved at the time of separation.

i want to annul our marriage but do i have sufficient grounds to do it?

Zki, you may want to explore the possibility of annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

my friend is got married in philippines but is seperated and is staying now in norway.

Can she file a divorce here in norway so she can get married in norway?

John Paul, any divorce obtained by a Filipino citizen anywhere will not be recognized in the Philippines and any subsequent marriage will not be recognized. A Filipino citizen must obtain an annulment in the Philippines to be able to remarry.

i got married last year in a philippine consulate. the singleness certificate we presented was expired but they still issued us a marriage license. is the marriage valid? can this be a ground for annulment?

czyrine, your marriage is valid. What you mention above is not grounds for annulment.

i’ve been married in 1997 at age of 18 and my hunsband was 30.aside of bieng jobless i found out that my husband is drug addicted.and like other women who faced difficulty of having mental illness partner i decided to leave him in 2003 without any legal action.i am both physicaly and emotionaly battered wife while we are together.and thats the reason why i feel bitterness for him…can i use drug addiction for annulment?im hopefully waiting for your legal advice…thank you and goodluck.

I got married on February 2, 2006, and on our wedding night, the marriage was never consumated. In addition, I have proof that my application for marriage had only an 8 day waiting before marrying, instead of the recommeded 10 day waiting period. After bringing wife and her child to Canada in 2007, we have remained together for about one year. We seperated in 2008. Do I have legal grounds to get my marriage annulled? If not, do I have any legal rights to the division of her assets in the Philippines?

Ed, separation is not grounds for annulment. You may want to explore filing a petition on the grounds of psychological incapacity included in the petition would be the judicial separation of properties.

good day. i got married when i was 21 and 8 months pregnant. the information provided for the 5 minute civil marriage was not true. im not a filipino citizen, my birthplace and religion were not correct as well. (i’m an american citizen through birth in the US)

**i have a permanent restraining order against him since he was physically abusing me for the duration of the 2 years we were together. haven’t seen him for the past 4 years.

my ex has already married another. how he was able to do this…i guess money really is the universal language of the world. If your ex did marry without first obtaining an annulment, it is grounds for legal separation and the filing of a bigamy case.

question 2>> is this grounds for annullment? i know it could be grounds for bigamy if my marriage is indeed valid.

Kendra, if your parents were Filipino, you may be also a Filipino citizen. Maybe your ex was able to remarry by obtaining an annulment. Check with the NSO to see if your marriage was annulled.

hello po.. can i just ask? my boyfriend is already separated for seven years to his wife. The wife is in abroad and has family there already. Is this a strong grounds para po ma grant sa bf ko yung ‘Presumption of Death?’. How long it will take if ever, & how nuch will it cost? thank you po.

Baby, using presumption of death is risky. If the presumed dead wife shows up the new marriage will be invalidated. For there to be presumption of death there must be some strong indication that the person may have died, usually because the person was in a very dangerous area such as a war zone.

Just a follow up..even if the information provided wasn’t correct, then the marriage is valid? you see…my ex was the one who did all the “maneuvering”, so we could get married. I only showed up at the RTC, said the words, signed the paper. I didn’t file for a legal capacity to marry, we didnt have a marriage license. Just paid the judge and that was it.

Kendra, if you really want to discuss your case in detail it would be better for you to meet with a lawyer for a consultation.

hi,i got married 2006 but never live with my husband.he”s in the philippines and im here in us.i want to end our marriage.can i file for divorse here since i’m a us citizen?thank you.

Ann, it depends, were you a Filipino Citizen at the time of your marriage? If, yes then the divorce will not be recognized in the Philippines.

Hi, my question is not about annulment but im hoping you can help me since you seem to know everything a lot about family law. my dad left us for another woman and my mum is a stroke patient (mentally and psychologically incapacitated) we don’t know if my dad and the mistress is cohabiting now but we want to know what legal options are available to us specially when we are financially challenged by the situation because my dad stopped giving support for my mum’s medications.. thanks a lot

hi i was married last 1998 and was separated from my estranged husband last 2001. the reasons why we broke up because i was physically, mentally and emotionally tortured. his family could even testify to his actions and even advised me to leave their son for me to move on. after couple of years being separated, he impregnated our helper with a baby girl. though he denied but his family strongly acknowledge that he is the father of the, would it be enough for me to file a petition of annulment?

Infidelity is not grounds for divorce. You may wish to examine psychological incapacity as grounds for divorce.

hi again in adition to my question on sept.22.Yes i was a filipino citizen at time of my marriage. can i get divorce here in us and file a petition for recognition of foreign judgment in the philippines?thank you.

helo sir…is there any payment for the consultation. Thank you…

Both my spouse and I are RP nationals. We married in RP but a year later, we had our differences and we left each other more than 10 years na. We are both abroad now.

Since that time we are incommunicado, although my sources tell me that she has remarried a foreigner, has children, living abroad, and changed her citizenship.

I just want to know how such changes on her part will allow me to remarry. If so, do I need to provide proof? BTW, I don’t want to press bigamy.

Could it also be possible that she has already had our marriage annulled without my knowing? If I check with the NSO it was annulled, will I also be allowed to remarry? Will the NSO allow me to check?

Tks po,… your site is really so insightful. Looking forward to your reply.

Johnny, yes the possibility exists that your wife was granted an annulment and you were not informed. You may check the records at the NSO to be sure, they will give you the information as it concerns you. If your marriage was annulled you may remarry.

my friend have married 9years with 2kids. he married his wife bcos of responsibility in impregnant lady.during the marriage period they are not in good terms which lots of thorn between them.

now, both of them already live separate for 2years and still communication bcos of the the meantime, they want to end their marriage life bcos to restart the life. did they granted any annulment for them to start a new life.

Cici, they must have grounds to file a petition of annulment. They should consult a lawyer to see what grounds are the best for their case.

I was married last April 1998. Me and my ex-husband got separated last August 2001 due to unsuccessful marriage. So, we’ve been separated for about 8 yrs. And for about 8 yrs there was no any support from my ex-husband(Emotional, Parental, Financial etc.).

I heard that after 7 yrs of no communications from your ex-husband/wife. It will be automatically annulled? Is it true?

She-Anne, there is no such thing as automatic annulment, no matter how many years of separation.

i have a male friend,he was separated with her wife for 2 years. He is supporting his daughter. And her wife is being rumored living in with his batch mate. Her wife live their house and took everything they had when he was on duty. He was assigned in far place when she live the house.I just wanna ask if it will be automatically annulled? and how much will it cost for the annulment? pls help him…

honey geem, there is no such thing as automatic annulment. Only a judge in a court of law may issue a decree of annulment to dissolve a marriage.

my wife left me for 2 years not knowing her whereabouts and lately knowing that she did have an affair and got pregnant.i want to file annulment case,is adultery and bigamy is suitable for the grounds of annulment to be filed?

Alijoe, First you should check if your wife has already obtained an annulment or not. If she has obtained an annulment you may or may not be able to file the cases as it would all depend if she was married to you at the time of the crime.

Bigamy is crime where a person marries a second time while still being married to another person.

tq for the reply sir. i will inform them and let them to decide it.

Can lack of marriage license render the annulment void?

Daniel, the lack of a marriage license will not void a marriage.

Anyway, is there any grounds on my situation to file annulment?

She-Anne, you should consult with a lawyer to see if psychological incapacity may be used as grounds for a petition for annulment of your case.

hi! My friend married last October 24, 2004. And lost his work last June 2005, she was living in zamboanga then and his here in manila. They lost contact around November 2005, and got work again last march 2006. She suddenly showed up but he refuse to live with her. Its been more than 3 years since then. Is there any way that he could file annulment on grounds of falsified birth certificate? he’d only learn about her true age when her SSS Id was mailed to his address here in manila. Please he really need an advice. Thanks in advance

when a spouse abandoned his partner.Can he file an annulment without the partner’s knowledge?

What are the possible grounds if he filed a petition?

Can a petitioner file an annulment in other city where he is not residing and could proceed with the hearings?

if a respondent don’t go with hearings and just receive summons via registered mail, is there a possibility that an annulment be valid or approved?

Mariz, If the other spouse can not be found, the judge orders the publication of the petition in a newspapaper and the case continues.

There are many possible grounds that can be used to file a petition for annulment.

The petition must be filed in the municipality where one or the other of the spouses is a resident.

Yes, a decree of annulment may be issued even if the respondent does not appear in court.

Im work, working in dubai at present, and then since early year 2009, i found my wife getting cold to me, Then my brother saw my wife and guy walking holding hands, recently,

Then last week i got a picture as evidence showing loving in bed.

Sir, can this evidence shall ground for adultery case, i want to file a case when i back to philippines,

Lito, it appears that you may have enough evidence to file an adultery case. But, you should show all the evidence to a lawyer, you will also need to have your witnesses appear in court.

my wife and i we’ve been married for 4yrs. she has a daughter before we got married, after getting married i let her daughter use my surname but w/ legal papers and proper documents and treat her as if she is my own…but now my wife left (we have 3 kids) us for some reason and decided to lived w/ her parents again… is there any legal actions that i can do bcoz i want to get married again but this time to a more responsible and mature woman…about her daughter is there any law that will void her rights for me as her father? i’m really confused on what actions will i take..thanks…

Macario, you have rights as a father on your steps-daughter unless you adopted her. To remarry, you will have to obtain an annulment.

I physically separated from my husband since 2006 due to drug dependency, then i found out that even before our marriage he has been like that. could it be a ground for annulment? During the entire marriage he has not secured stable job cos of attitude problems etc connected to his drug addiction, so he not supporting the family financially. we have 3 children btw.

Ana, drug addiction before the marriage may be used as grounds for annulment if all the requirements are met.

is bigamy, lack of support for 2years for our son & change of religion from catholic to muslim inorder for him to get married again in other country be a basis to file a cancellation/void of marriage?

Mykel, none of what you wrote can be used to obtain an annulment. You may want to explore the possibility of using psychological incapacity as the grounds for annulment.

Hi , my inquiry , i have a g/f in Davao , she is separated from her husband and is applying for an annulment. When her anulment is granted. Can we re-marry in the Philippines ?

Tim, once a person has obtained an annulment they may legally remarry in the Philippines.

i got married without a birth certificate. i do have the paper but it was not submitted to the civil registrar so in effect, i do not have one. can this be ground for annulment? coz my wife and i have drifted apart. we do not love each other anymore. i want to marry someone else.

also, when i got married, the person who gave the consent was my brother instead of my parents.

please help me as to how i will be able to marry the woman i love.

Sam, what you wrote is not grounds for annulment, you should explore with a lawyer the possibility to use psychological incapacity as the grounds.

my husband is living with his other girl for 4 yrs and he has 2 kids with his girl. we have no communication for 4 yrs we have 1 12yrs old daughter. can i file annullment?

Rhema, infidelity and separation are not grounds for annulment. You may want to explore with a lawyer using psychological incapacity as grounds for annullment.

I got married 2002.After a year I found out my husband was married 1997. Now we are separated anymore. I plan to get marry in the future.What will I do to make my papers clean from my ex-husband? plas reply. Thanks

Lilia, you may file a petition for annulment on the grounds of bigamous marriage.

i am married for 3 years with one kid here in philippines..we had a civil wedding then…in those years i had too much ups and downs with regards in our marriage life..he doesn’t even give the proper attention as a father to our kid..he always depend on my salary though both of us got own jobs respectively..he did secrets affair and i had seen a video from a mall wherein i saw it with the helpf my friend..i left for abroad this year..he doesn’t even look after our kid very well..nor taking her out for malls..he always tell my parents that he’s busy…even when our kid got sick..he text me and told all the money they borrowed for ur kid…help to get out of this marriage. we are both christians..if i will convert into muslim,,is there a possibility that our marriage will be nulled. need help please…

Challa, changing religion does not annul a marriage. You will need to file a petition for annulment and the judge must issue a decree of annulment for your marriage to be annulled.

Antonio(my husband now in America) was married with another woman in the Philippines in 1966.

Antonio and his former wife(the woman) was divorced in 1993 in New Jersey. Antonio married me on Jan of 1966. I want their marriage annulled in the Philippines so we can marry there. I heard about petition of recognition for foreign divorce, is it tantamount to annulment in the Philippines? And how does it work?

Antonio and the woman were both american citizens at the time of their divorce. Both Filipino citizens at the time of their marriage. Thanks.

Maria, filing a petition for recognition of foreign divorce can only be done if one of the spouses was a foreign citizen at the time of the marriage and if it was the foreign spouse who applied for the divorce. In this case both spouses were Filipino at the time of marriage so neither may file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce. Your husband will have to file a petition for annulment in the Philippines.

but isn’t that muslims cannot marry any christians??so unless my husband will convert our marriage will be disregard..any testimonials regarding these??please answer…

I got married on March of 2005. Before getting married,marriage license is a requirement and since I’m 21 already, parental advice was the requirement to get the marriage license and not parental consent. In the parental advice form, 1 of your parents signature should appear on it, but since my father is in the US and won’t allow us, I forged his signature.. After the marriage, he knew about it & said we cannot do anything anymore because we are married already.

And now, we are already separated for 1 year & 7 months already for reasons which I think exist in the grounds. He used to bit me when he’s drunk and financially incapable to support us. But I think he will oppose to the annulment thing if ever I will file it. Until now he keeps on bothering me.

I just want to know if I could still file an annulment if my father did not agreed & signed the parental advise form?

Erika, you are legally married and may file for annulment but not because your father did not sign the parental advise form. You should consult with a lawyer to see what gtrounds would be best for you to use.

hi, my husband is an addict. we had pretty rough time during our9 year marriage. when things got really bad, i told him to leave the house and he did, when he came back he said he wasn’t using anymore. after three years, i caught him 4days ago using shabu, he admitted to me that he did. can i use his addiction to file for annulment? would really appreciate a reply on the matter

Lindy, addiction can only be used as grounds for annulment if the spouse was a drug user before the marriage and the other spouse was not aware of this. Once the spouse found out that the other spouse is an addict the annulment must be filed within five years from the date of the marriage.

then my gf got pregnant i was 19 and she was 22, my family talk to her parents to settle it out of marraige they never agree and did not allow me leave their house anymore until she gave birth and we get married on 1994 i was 20 then. I am now abroad seperated but keep on supporting our 2 children. I dont love my wife anymore, Is there a ground to annul my marriage.

Ron, you might want to explore psychological incapacity as the grounds for your petition for annulment.

I don’t want to call it marriage for there is none, but i had a church wedding almost 4 years ago (Dec 2005) that is a total nightmare. ‘Though the groom came in late, he arrived with his alleged uncle for the whole immediate family rushed his dad to the hospital due to stroke, whom we found out later wasn’t true. Despite my animosity to continue, the wedding pushed through for I ate up his alibi. But after the wedding, with no food on the reception venue (he assured me that it is well taken care of before the wedding & even while signing the marriage contract), found out a lot of lies, one after the other including his fake job claims & his family’s various debt. Ending, no consummation of marriage, asked him to go back to his family and never lived with him since, and I never change my status. Can i declare my marriage void? Or an annulment case? Do i have legal basis? I wanted to free myself from the bond, really appreciate your response. Thanks!

Mikee, you should consult with a lawyer to see the best grounds to use for your petition of annulment.

we were married for 10 years but my husband left us for another woman and they have a child already and we have 2 kids. I am the one supporting our kids. can i use this as an excuse to live with another man? what are the possible consequences? Can my husband sue me for adultery?

Jasmin, there are no excuses for living with a man other than your husband. If you do live with another man yes, your husband may file a case for adultery against. But, since he is living with another woman you could file a case of concubinage. Why not get an annulment and put things right.

hi, i just want to ask what we are going to do. I have a boyfriend abroad he is working there 3 years. he is married but 6 years separated with no communication at all, but he is supporting his children when he discovered where they live just only last year. Is there married considered nulled and void because they have no communication for the last 6 years? Or if not we should haver to file for annullment? for what ground? hoping i can hear from you. thank you very much and Gid bless.

Jen, lack of communication and separation are not grounds for annulment.

My wife and I got married because I got her pregnant after two months of dating. While initially planned not to get married, her mother pressured her into marrying me, to which I obliged.

Can I file for annulment stating undue pressure or influence from her mother as my basis

Kenneth, you will haven to discuss this in more detail with a lawyer to see if those grounds may be used.

Hello, i have a question. i was married in the philippines to a filipino citizen back in 2003. My filipino citizenship was never established since the Dept of Foreign Affairs has said that since my father is an american, it doesn’t give me the right to claim filipino citizenship even if i was born in the philippines. My ex and I emigrated to the U.S. and i became an American citizen. My then wife and I divorced a couple of years ago. I read in an article in a filipino newspaper in the U.S. that if a filipino citizen that divorces a person of a different citizenship, to prevent hardship on the part of the filipino citizen, he/she can remarry without the annulment process. They quoted a provision in the philippine law about marriage but sad to say, i can’t remember. My question is, is there such a provision in the philippine laws about marriage? Can the filipino citizen remarry in the philippines without acquiring an annulment? Cause I, the american citizen between me and my ex, plan on marrying my fiance in the philippines. Can i remarry without getting an annulment of my previous marriage? i greatly appreciate anything you could do to help, thanks

Edward, divorce is not automatically recognized in the Philippines. If one spouse is a foreigner and he/she obtains a divorce overseas the Filipino spouse may file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce. A Filipino citizen may not remarry without first obtaining an annulment.

i was married last sept. 1985 (not sure of the exact date)& got separated after a month of marriage. We have a daughter, she’s only a month old when i left with my daughter. She’s 24 now, i haven’t seen of even communicated with my husband since then. I even don’t know where he is right now. Is this a ground for annulment?

i have a boyfriend now for about 8 years and we have a daughter and that time my parent don’t allow me to get married because i was still 15 years old at that time as the same as he ..but for about 6 years in our relationship we don’t have a communication since they moved to manila and he pursue his studies there then after all we see each other for the past 6 years then i discover that he got married there last 2007 at the age of 20 .. but he explains to me that he was forced to marry his wife because of the girl will be terminated in her job for giving birth without a husband.. then now he is very willing to annul his marriage so that we will get married.. i still love him so do he.. do we still have a chance??please answer me.. we are very confused now hope you can help us..

Iris, your friend should consult a lawyer to see what grounds can be used to file a petition for annulment.

I was looking for some answers regarding my pinay gf. She says she was legally married in the philippines, twice and now has to file for annulment twice? I don’t see how this is possible? She says when she was younger she was coerced into signing papers by her bf and that she did not know it was marriage papers, and then was legally married to her second husband who she had a daughter with later in life, but has since been seperated for yrs. I am trying to figure out how this is possible and have to have two annulments? Am I getting the run around here? Thanks.

Jeff, yes it is possible that records are not up to date or that there is a misspelling of her name on some documents.

If I got married in the phillipines to a filipino and i am American, but I did not stay in the country for the required 12 days and the marriage certificate is actually dated for after I left the country, is my marriage still valid or is it considered null and void?

I am a canadian resident my annulment in the philippines is going on. I already got my divorce here though i know that they don’t recognized divorce there. I have a boyfriend who is separated for 9 years and they have separation agreement. when they got married the girl was 17 and my bf 19.but the license was released when the girl became 18. Is there a chance that this can be declared null and void? thanks

Ginice, yes there is a chance that their marriage will be declared null and void but this has to be done by a judge in court.

hi; concubinage and adultery are grounds for legal separations and not for annulment. sir can i file a case to my wife for adultery because after spying my wife i finally find out that my wife has another man in his life., and there is a moment that my wife are not around to care our children.

Mark, if you have proof of course you may file a case against your wife.

My friend was married in Phils at age 18. Her father did not sign his consent. She is now 29 and has been living and working outside of Phils for 3 years to support her children. Her husband was violent and abusive toward her and she wants to file for annulment and get custody of her children. They are currently with her husbands parents in the Phils. She has not been in contact with her husband for quite some time. If she is able to get her marriage annuled, I plan to marry her and provide a better future for her and her children. What advice could you provide for us to make sure everything is handled properly and in a timely manner? I am able to provide any financial support that her and her children need. Thank you for your assistance.

Alex, your friend may file a petition for annulment included in the petition will be the custody of the children.

hi, i know that infidelity is not considered as annulment but what if it started that way and trust can’t be brought back to the relationship seens your marriage is not base on ‘love’ more on mutual understanding of the situation need at that time? is that available for the couple to get annulment?

Lisa, you should look at using psychological incapacity as the grounds for your petition for annulment.

Hello.We just got married after alot of promises from my husband.Before we got married,we were engaged for a yr then he had a gf and got her pregnant.Now before we got married, we agreed on the situation and to just support the child and the lady. Now,he is hurting me emtionally constantly and continues his affair with his gf. Can i file for concubinage and annulment? He is an australian living in philippines and i am phil living here in Dubai.We are married for 2 wks now in pasay conducted by a judge.How long does a marriage get regstered?

Michelle, it takes a few weeks for a marriage to be registered with the NSO. If you have proof you may file for concubinage but infidelity is not grounds for annulment.

I’m separated for more than 5 years now not counting the 6 months of last year, that we tried to settle but nothing happened, we really couldn’t get along with each other anymore since She keeps on telling me that the 2nd child is not mine that she got pregnant by other guy when we were together 5 year ago… She didn’t mentioned that it was the reason why she left but instead she left because she said that I wasn’t a good husband and a good father to them. Since i don’t want to believe her that the 2nd child is not mine, I went to check personally the BC of the child in NSO and found out that the father is unknown. Can this be a ground for me to persue an annulment?

Aethan, infidelity is not grounds for grounds for annulment.

May bf po kc aq n me asawa,d kmi mkpgsama kc ayaw nya mg pa annul nanakot xa n mgdedemanda raw xa s bf q…eh lagi nmn xa wala kc lagi xa ng aabroad at saka b4 d cla in good terms ngyn lng…ano po b dapat kong gwin pra mging ok n kmi ng bf ko

Marianne, if your boyfriend files a petition for annulment the judge will decide to issue a decree of annulment or not. Your boyfriend’s wife does not have to agree, it is the judge’s decision that counts.

My husband and I have been separated for 3 yrs now (not legally). He’s not giving any kind of financial support to our kid. Though he still visits his son from time to time.

I want an annulment. He’s sick right now. Type2 diabetic and he’s no longer capable to work because he’s physically weak. There was also a time when we are in the process of separation that he bacame alcoholic. Can these be grounds for annulment?

Nette, illness is not grounds for annulment.

Hello, I’ve been married for three years now. But my husband has no work since then. We still have no child until now. ANd i feel that all the burden was all in my shoulder. Can i file for annulment, what ground? THanks…

Rhen, everyone has the right to file a petition for annulment as long as they have the grounds to do so.

It’s me athan… Thanks for the reply… but if I may ask, how about having her pregnant with another guy. Is it not a ground?

Hi, i need an advise i dont know what will i do…me and the father of my son were planning to get a civil wedding but i found out when i get the cenomar that his married already (secret marriage last nov.2002). He never told me coz he thought that it will not going to have a record coz they never asked them any documents the arrangement was made by there friend. But they never leave together coz after the wedding on the next day the girl flew to U.S. then after that they never had a communication after two years since the marriage he found out from the relatives of the girl that she was married already in the U.S. Till now they never had any communication.

What will i do coz i know to file an annulment is very expensive and we dont have such amount. Can it be the seven years with out communication be a ground to void there marriage? or what other grounds that will void the marriage?

Eva, there is no law that says 7 years of no communication or separation voids a marriage. A couple stays married no matter how many years they are separated. The only other grounds that seems available to you based on the information you gave is to file a petition of annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

thank you so much for your advice..we are looking forward to consult a lawyer regarding with his situation..i have a question how much it takes to file a petition for annulmnet?or for an annulment case?

Look at all the inquiries here. Our current law on marriage and annulment needs updating and should not be based or influenced by the church.

a lot of marriage fail because we are being forced by law to stay married with someone who we no longer have any feelings for. the same is true for those who have been forced or tricked into marriage.

people should NOT be forced in a condition that is no longer tolerable. this is why we must have a secular government.

I was married on year 2000 with a bar girl. (We went to a wedding ceremony in Manila City Hall right after the nite I met her, I was really crazy that time and hooked in drugs). I see her 3 times only during my vacation (15 days every 2 years). I stop seeing her on year 2005, since we are not having child. I have 4 children from my 2 girlfriends. I want an annulment for me to be fair with my girlfried. IS IT POSSIBLE? Pls I need your professional advise.

Arex, you may file a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

Hi!I am a mother of 4 kids,32 years old and was married since Jan.2000.I never knew that he is capable of hurting me physically and for so may times, he almost killed me.I didn’t file for any complaint because I am trying to preserve my family.I went abroad last July of 2007 and went home last year of May 2008 for a month vacation.I thought he is not going to hurt me again but he hasn’t change.In this case, can I file for annulment?Thanks!

Tina, you may file a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

I was married to a Filipina last 2000. After which may marriage lasted only two weeks as she went astrayed and left home without telling me where she went. I have searched all over but couldnt find her until as of date.

In between Im back home in Malaysia since 2007. I have also found another Filipina girl that I love very much and where planning to ge married again.

The question is ” Can I remarry again in Civil and Church”

Do I have to get annulment? and in what grounds that I can use as she was the one who abondoned me right after our wedding without any reason.

Tom, you can not remarry civilly until you obtain an annulment. You may consider filing a petiton for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity. The church marriage will depend on the church where you wish to marry as each one has it’s own rules and regulations.

I’ve been separated for 2 years with my husband. He left us for another woman. I just want to ask if I can get married again outside the Philippines with another man? Is it allowed? or Is it still considered as bigamy? Thanks.

Phoemela, yes it will be bigamy if you remarry without an annulment. Most countries have laws which classify bigamy as a crime.

We were married for almost 6yrs then we separated for almost 9yrs. We don’t have communication at all. We don’t have kids cause I guessed he is impotent. I was encouraging him to have check up before but he refused. I know he’s the reason why we cant have kids coz I already got one from my present boyfriend. Can impotent be a ground for annulment?

i was married since 2002 and from that year i start going abroad cause my ex dont have job. then only last year i knew that he have another wife and a child and he even let our daughter live with them. what can i do please tell me what to do…

Hazel, infidelity is not grounds for annulment. You can file a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

I met a wonderful girl when i was on a tour duty over sea’s and she is still married but her husband walked out on her and took her daughter 4 years ago and has not had any contact since then until about 3 months ago. i know walking out on someone is not sufficient grounds for annulment, but is kidnapping.

Thank you so very much.Now I have a new hope, after all the nightmares I’ve experienced with my husband.If I will file for an annulment, how long does it normally take for the case to finish?And roughly how much do I have to spend so I can prepare it?And will it still be possible to say that the reason why I want to file an annulment is because he is hurting me physically.And for those instances, I didn’t file for a complaint nor even take any medical report?Thanks!More power!God bless!

During the course of the marriage, if the wife was impregnated by another man, can husband file for annulment under ADULTERY?? They only live together for 3 weeks since getting married on May 2005, as the husband went to work abroad?? Thanks for your kind assistance..

Lanie, adultery / infidelity is not grounds for annulment. But the husband ay file a case for adultery.

On Nov of 2004 I told my wife to go her parents house with my son to live there for the meantime until I start on my job. she said she if they leave they will not return anymore to my parents house, I just have to get them when we will live on our own and I said ok. after a month I fetch them ’cause we’ll be living on our own but she refused. when I asked her why she just said she changed her mind. then Dec 2005 she gave birth to her son from a different man. I only knew about this on june of 2006. can this be a ground for annulment? tnx

My wife and I are both US citizen and was married in 1994 in the Philippines. She has filed for a divorce and I was wondering if i can file for an annulment after the divorce is final so i can marry again in the Philippines. A petition of recognition for foreign divorce allow me to marry again in the Philippines??

Daniel, Were you Filipno citizens at the time of your marriage?

A petition for recognition of foreign divorce can only be filed by you in the Philippines if your wife was a US citizen at the time of your marriage. If you and your wife were Filipino citizens at the time of your marriage in the Philippines, you will have to file a petition for annulment.

hi i just wanted to ask a question. I am married in malaysia for 2 years but i am a philippine citizen. Now we separated with my malaysian husband. My question is. is it valid in philippines about my marriage in malaysia? coz i want to get a fiancee visa in uk.

Celyn, if you were legally married in Malaysia, then the marriage is valid in the Philippines.

My boyfriend had a secret marriage at the age of 22. The girl is 21 that time. They forged their parent’s signature because they thought that the witness must be their parents. Witnesses affixed their signature under parent’s name. Is the marriage null and void or can it be reconsidered for annulment?

Amy, the marriage is most probably valid, but without seeing the documents it is impossible to give a 100% correct answer.

I met a guy in the internet and we met personally for the first time in the phil Nov. 2005. We got married at Quezon City, Phil last 2005 at the office of the judge. Then I went back to US and he went back to KSA to finish his contract.It was July 2008 when I found out that he was married before our marriage. I had a copy of Cenomar and it says there that he has 2 marriage. I confronted him and he admitted it. Since then I stop the communication with him, I don’t even know where he at now. Is our marriage null and void, and do I need to file an annulment?

Melanie, no marriage is voided automatically, you must file a petition for annulment at the Regional Trial Court to have your marriage annulled on the grounds of bigamous marriage.

I just want to ask, will the marriage be valid even if the license is pre arrange and it does not go through the usual process (posting for 10 days, no seminar attended).The license number was given on the same date of the marriage. How would that affect the validity of the civil marriage?

good morning m’s’, i would like to ask, is physical abuse is ground for annulment?

J’ar, physical abuse is not grounds for annulment but it is grounds for legal separation.

Hi! I would like to ask if what should i do since my american husband is still supporting his ex-wife eventhough they do not have a kid. And also supports his girlfriend financially as well. He is really hurting me mentally and emotionally.He sends his salary to ex-wife and just a little amount for us. Anyway,we had a child and im so worried. I would like to annul him but he doesnt want. Pls i need ur advice.

Maila, you can be the one to file a petition for annulment, the judge will decide to grant it or not.

I sent a message before regarding annulment. You told me that I still need to file for petition for annulment at the Regional Trial Court for the grounds of bigamous marriage. My problem is I am residing permanently here at US. Is any representative can file the petition for annulment in my behalf. What are the requirements to file an annulment? Do I need to hire a lawyer for this and approximately how much will I pay to annul my marriage? Please help me.

hi good day,i am married with filipina but been separated for 2 years but not leagally.she promise to file annulment 4 times but still hasn’t.she holding my filipino passport since i have duel my citizenship.we dont have kids.she blackmailing me to get my filipino passport and my personal belongings but after paying her she refuses to comply.i have girlfriend now i have waited for over years for her to file the annulment so i cant get on my life shes always treaten to put me and my gf to jail.what are my financial obligation towards her?any information to advice my situation.salamat…..

John, you can file the annulment, you don’t have to wait for your wife to file the petition. As for the passport you can go to the DFA and apply for a new one by telling them your story.

Please advise if religion can be one of the grounds for annulment. I got married to a Muslim lady when I was 22 years old. It took place in one of the offices in the Manila City Hall without even any consent from both parties. The woman I married is a true bloded Muslim. Kindly advise me if there is any way I can file of annulment. Thank you

Ian, difference of religion is not grounds for annulment.

hi good day thank you for the advice i appriciate ur time and effort…i have some question to ask my wife text me and she treathen me again and my girlfreind to send to jail coz of not giving her money.she said she can send me and my gf to jail for concubinage.for criminal offense.what can i do if she treathen me again?and i cant file annulment coz she always treathen me,and i dont have a lawyer yet coz i dont know how to find a good lawyer.can u give me more advice in my situation.thanks….

My Filipna gf was married to a Filipino man. She was 16 at the time and her parents forged some documents to show she was 18. She is now 35 and has been separated from her husband for 6 years. If we present her original birth certificate and marriage license, will that be enough to get the marriage nullified?

Scott, no marriage is void automatically, your girlfriend must file a petition in court for annulment using the grounds that she was a minor at time of her marriage.

My filipina friend 27, had met a American 3yrs ago online July’07 he visited Oct 07 returend a 2x married her in RP Nov 07 stayed until Febuary 08, broke up, vowing to never see her again. she’s not preggy

what are our options for annullment? so we can go on. or is it better to transfer too and reside in another Asian country until we can end her fake-marriage?

Chad, why is it a fake marriage? Living in another country does not change anything. She may explore the possibility of fileing a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

My boyfriend is Italian, he was married in italy before but been divorced for several years. He said that under church law in italy even if he was a divorcee he was not allowed to get married there again for second time because catholic church there won’t allow, but he can get married in any country where divorce and second marriage are allowed.

I know here in the Philippines that second time marriage is allowed as long as the first marriage is legally dissolved. If we get marry here in the Philippines will it still be legal if we plan to live in italy?will my kids will still be his legitimate child?

Cath, your boyfriend probably means that he can not have another church marriage. A civil marriage is not a problem. Your civil marriage will be valid and your children legitimate. A church is annulment is very difficult to obtain.

OK, thank you. Is this something your firm could do for us? How long does this take and are there any repercussions for the action taken of falsifying documents? Do we need any other proof besides the birth certificate and marriage license?

me and my ex husband agreed to file for annulment,i was abroad then and i never signed any documents or never seen a psychiatrist or neither have i attended a court hearing.the next thing i know was our marriage was annulled after only 7 or 8 months,then my ex husband re married after only a year.our son doesnt have any support and i am stil bear my exs i have doubts about the legallity of the annulment,what is the best thing to do

Alleli, only the petitioner has to appear in court. If you do not appear the petition for annulment is published in a newspaper after which the case continues in court. The psy report could have been made based on interviewing people that know you. You can check with the NSO if your marriage contract has been annotated and obtain a copy from the court of the final decree of annulment and the transcripts of the hearings.

I have been married for less than a year and I am having a problem with my wife, fighting

arguing, being verbally abused to the extent and sexually deprive (sorry for the term) we have

1 kid which is 4 month old and I am seeking for an annulment, she agrees but does not want me

to be with the person I truly fell in love with. anything I can do?

Christoff, you can file a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

I am a Canadian citizen who married a Philippine national in July, 2007 in the Philippines. She got pregnant with another man’s baby 6 months after we were married. I think this is definite grounds for annulment (and maybe even a lawsuit). How do I proceed with the process of getting an annulment?

Richard, infidelity is not grounds for annulment but you may be able to file a criminal case of adultery against your wife. if you would like to file a petition for annulment you may contact us for a consultation to see how to have your marriage dissolved.

hi my husband and i got married year 2003 but we got separated sometime in year 2006.i left the house and lived with my mom since.our relationship is civil in fact were like friends. he had flings but now she got a girl pregnant. he plans to take the girl to our house after she gives birth.and that’s a no no for me…

what case can i file? is it concubinage? will they both be jailed for that? thanks…

Nina, concubinage is a criminal offense and they can be jailed.

I was married at age 19.I was working a full time work.My husband would not work.I stayed for 5 years with him,he deprived us finance,we had little food to eat.We had a baby girl,when she was still a baby,she turned blue and stopped breathing.My husband,something wrong with his mind,woulds not get off the couch to help me.I had to get my baby and carry her to the hospital in my arms.I would not help me,he stayed on the couch.I left him just over two years agoe,and now i want an anullment.Thank you…can i on these grounds …and what would the term be.

Tina, what you wrote is not grounds for annulment. you should consult a lawyer to see what grounds you could use.

Hi, Just I just want to clarify if you file an annulment for example (I had a church wedding before) so if i file an annulment is it a separate annulment for church and civil? or is it just the same

and if ever my annulment was granted and my marriage was null and void can i still remarry in the church or is it only possible in a civil wedding? looking forward for your prompt reply thanks.

Karl, church and civil annulments are complete separate issues. Only your church can tell you if they will allow you to remarry.

nais kopo sanang huminging advice sa inyo,isa poako sa masugid nyong taga basa ng mga advice sainyong site.may isang anakpo akoat nagsasama kaming kanyang ama,.kahit po hindi p kami kasal,after 7 years ng paasasamanamin he dicided to go to abroad,evrythingsok pa naman po nung unang buwan nya dun,but when moneyis issue,ayaw po pumayag ng magulang nya nasa akin nahuhulog ang allowance nila,his father always saying that I dont have rights to get all the benifits of his sonbecause were not married yet.naputol po ang sustento ng anak,for some reasons,siniraan po ako ng kanyang tatay at sinbe sa asawa kona my lalaki ako.Gustokolang po malaman although maramipo kayong alam about “rights” may karapatan po ba ang anak ko na humingi ng sustento sa papa nya kahit ndi kami kasal,ano po ba ang dapat kong gawin.

gOdbless and more power.

Weng, you have the right to obtain support for your son from his father, but you will not be able to file a case unless he is in the Philippines.

hi its me again.what if our annulment was filled in cavite and we are actually residents of laguna?and when i couldnt go to the court hearing since i was abroad,i am sure that there was nothing published in the news papers then or is there a way i can check?…i just want to confirm 2 things,1st if the procedure was done legally or was it rushed so that my ex can get married again,or 2nd if it was really done legally,how can i check and what documents to i need have to change my status back to single.and what about our son,is there another way to claim support since it was never mentioned in the annulment proceedings?…your advice will be greatly appreciated.tnx

my boyfriend is CIVIL MARRIED in the philippines and he is planning to seek for an annulment. i would like to know if he’ll be granted to be annulled, can we get married in the CATHOLIC CHURCH in the philippines as well? thanks.

Alexa, a civil annulment will not allow you to remarry in a church. Your boyfriend will have to try to obtain a church as well as a civil annulment.

good afternoon, i got married at the age of 21 but we didnt obtain a marriage license, the lawyer who did the ceremony just made an affidavit that we didnt need such document because we lived for five years prior to marriage which is not true. if i will file an annulment with the ground of lack of marriage license, is the petition be granted?by the way i have two daughters with another man before that marriage.

Joan, lack of a marriage is a valid grounds of annulment.

I got married in 1986 and I was 17 years old during the time. Is my marriage null and void then?

Pepper, it depends in what year you were married as the laws have changed over the years. Even though your marriage may be null and void, a judge must declare it annulled for your records to be updated.

hi, its me, alexa again. i just wanna followup and clear this:

“Alexa, a civil annulment will not allow you to remarry in a church. Your boyfriend will have to try to obtain a church as well as a civil annulment.”

does he need to obtain a church annulment even if he wasn’t married in the church? he was married only by a judge on their municipality. thanks.

We got married in 1983, and in March 1987, he divoreced me when he was in US, and got married. Can this be a ground for filing an Annulment aside from no show plus abonedonment? I have my boyfriend and we are planning of getting married. Waiting for your reply and thanks.

Pamela, the divorce and remarriage of your husband in the US is not grounds for annulment. You might want to explore the possibility of filing a petition for annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

hi, my husband is a us immigrant, and now she has another woman…he is threatening me that our church wedding in the philippines will not be valid if he became american citizen? Is that true? Or can he divorced me once he became an american citizen? pls help me!

other infos…he told me that he never declare our marriage in the united states…so his telling me that he is still single in the united states.Is that true…what are my rights as her wife.

Marily, a church or a civil wedding does not become invalid when someone changes citizenship. I am sure that the US government knows he is married as the US Embassy always does a background check on all visa and immigration you

Hi. my bf have 3 kids from his previous marriage but they ( he & his wife) have been separated( not legally)for 5years ( since 2005). He went here in the province last 2004 without knowing that his wife was living with another man and just confirmed it when he went back by 2005. We have been living together for 4years and we already have 2 kids. lately, we learned that his ex-wife already has a daughter with his live in parner. My bf and I want to marry and he wanted to file an annulment. What grounds can he use considering that both of them already have kids with and are currently living with different partners and both have committed concubinage/ adultery?

Furthermore, I am a lumad ( not a muslim) and we plan to get married under the law of our tribe. Would it be possible? If our law will grant our marriage, can it be considered legal ? If it can be considered legal, will it terminate his marriage with his previous wife without undergoing the process of annulment?

Thanks! looking forward to ur urgent reply. God bless u more!

Lene, your boyfriend can only terminate his marriage if he file a petition for annulment and the judge issues a decree of annulment.

pls help bf want to marry but he already married..we found out that his wife married also to a japanese..but we dont know who’s marry her first..if my bf or the japanese guy..he is planning to seek for an annulment but what if what if his wife got married first to a japanese guy.?my bf and his wife got married here in phil..his wife and the japanese guy got married at japan..we dont know what to do.pls help us..

Mika, it does not matter if your boyfriend’s wife was first married to him or to a Japanese citizen. He will still have to obtain an annulment to be able to marry you. If your boyfriend’s wife was married to the Japanese and did not obtain an annulment before marrying your boyfriend, then your boyfriend’s marriage is bigamous and an annulment can be obtained quite easily. If not he will have to consult a lawyer to see what grounds he can use to file a petition for annulment.

Me and my ex are already separated for almost 7 or 8 years and both of us have partners.

he now working in dubai .. he also has a 3 yr old son from another woman and I have my 2yr and 4 months old from my ex boyfriend and currently 8 months pregnant from my future husband, who is my current live in partner. Both my ex husband and I compromised to have an annulment and so he did filed one recently. My question is, he told me that someone is coming over to evaluate or question me . since I am pregnant right now, will i be on the loosing end on this annulment process? what’s going to happen if the one evaluating me see me like this? i mean pregnant as of the moment? i’m really confused.or is it ok to have everything rescheduled then after I gave birth?

thank you for the time reading this and i do hope you’ll help me so as my mind to be enlightened.

Che, I really don’t know who will be evaluating you. But you will be on the losing end if you don’t hire a lawyer to protect your interests especially if you have conjugal property.

we got married in 1992 and got separated in 1998 after heared that she’s living with other guy and got pregnant while i’m abroad,I’ved meet a girl in 2002 and were lived together until now and have 3 kids,I dont want to make things complicated between us since we make same mistakes,but my partner wants us to get marry.Can my wife or me can file an annulment? Since we’re planing to move to canada and if we got our marriege there, Is there posibility that I can be charged of begamy here in philippines?

Emac, if you marry in Canada you can be charged in Canada for bigamy. You can always file a petition for annulment, you must discuss with a lawyer what grounds to use.

I got married last 1996 but it didn’t last so got separated year 2001. My husband filed for an annulment that same year and unfortunately it was denied. Since then we haven’t me again but the last news I heard about him was he got a partner and 2 kids.

I’m just wondering if I can file a new annulment case and what would be the chances of having it approved? and also how much will cost?

Maria, I can not answer your question without knowing the reason why your husband’s petition for annulment was denied.

I and my ex wife was separated for 7 years with no communications, and i don’t know where she is. I left her because she commits adultery, somebody told me that she has already new husband and kids. Now i want to re-marry with other woman. Can this be a ground for annulment? How much will it take to void my first marriage? thank you.

Good site, thank you. My girlfriend is Filipino, separated and does not seem to have legal reason for annulment. I am Canadian, living in China. Is there any legally recognized method of marrying, without an annulment?

Bryan, if you marry your girlfriend who is married, your girlfriend will be committing the crime of bigamy. Your girlfriend must obtain an annulment in the Philippines if you wish to marry her legally. Have your girlfriend consult with a lawyer and she might be able to find grounds for annulment.

us i am reading this column i realize to have a few question on you …i want to know if my bf had a chance to apply for legal separation?they get married 6yrs ago and had 2children aged 7 and 5yrs girls and boys they get married under age like she was 18 and they adjusted it …now they both have diff relations us i mentioned him,she treatened us this time . i am so confused pls do give me some advice of what shall i do……thank you so much and more power…

Mhay, even if your boyfriend would get a legal separation he can not legally live with you or marry you. A legal separation does not dissolve a marriage. Only an annulment can dissolve a marriage. Please call our office if you wish a consultation to see how your boyfriend can obtain an annulment.

I got to read ur column and would like to inquire about my concerns regarding my marriage.First, I got married last Mar 2001 and I had 2 kids but my spouse and I never lived together, I found out Oct 2009, after almost 4 years of not having any communication with him that he just arrived in the U.S and is married to a Filipina. I decided to request for a CENOMAR copy from the NSO just this year for both our names, result is showing that I have 1 marriage record listed with him as the spoouse but for his it is also showing 1 marriage record but not with me but with the 2nd marriage he had last 2007 with the Filipina who went first in the U.S.

Sir, I am so confused about this, is this a result of the red tape here in the Phil. and he even had the chance to have a US Visa for misrepresentation.

Need your assistance badly what if in case I plan to marry a US citizen, do I still need to file an annulment? It seems that I am married to a person who is not married to me… Please help… Thank you so much

Joanne, you are legally married and you will need to obtain an annulment if you wish to remarry. Your husband’s second marriage is no valid. And yes, there are sometimes glitches in the NSO computer system.

I’m married since 1992, my husband and I got separated last 2000, we had a document from a lawyer. The reason we separate is because he is on drugs and he hit me. In fact my sisters send him to jail. Then he ask another chance to be us together again, so I gave him a chance, cause I am going abroad I dont want my kids to live alone. But now he is on drugs again and he did again what he did before, he sell our things for drugs. Im so tired of this situation. I want to focus my attention to my sons. Can I file an annulment for our marriage, cause before we only separate but it seems that he did not respect our separation. He always keep bothering me, that’s one reason also I go back to him cause I dont want any of my family will be hurt again if I will not go back with him.

Aze, not respecting your separation agreement is not grounds for annulment. You may want to explore the possibility of filing an annulment on the grounds of psychological incapacity.

You have a very interesting column here, and you seem to answer them pretty quickly, now let me try asking you about this plan I have in mind since the grounds for annulment here in our country is very tight.

My wife and I are not happy with our marriage anymore but we can not find any basis for annulment on the list. My plan is, since we are going to the states, as immigrants we would get married again there and get a divorce, is that a stupid idea or is legal? also get i get marry here again in the states?

if it is ok then is it applicable to other European countries as well? would that matter if we come back here in the Philippines?

Toni, any divorce you obtain overseas will not be recognized in the Philippines and if you remarry the marriage will be considered bigamous in the Philippines and not valid.

Hi! My bestfriend has been married with 2 kids for ten years and has not been living with the girl for almost 4 years now. They usually fight for some reason that made my bestfriend not to live with them (girl and kids) anymore. They are both catholic but they got married in a different religious group (i think, protestant) and all the witnesses just got paid for to sign on the papers. Will that be a ground for annulment? or he can just sort to a legal separation matter?

He wants to get an annulment and marry another girl in the future. What could be the best advise that you can give for him? Hope you can help. Thank you!

Sean, if your friend wants to get married he must file a petiton for annulment. Legal separation will not allow him to remarry. What you wrote above is not grounds for annulment.

Hi,Nice site… Please help me to answer my undying question…I was divorced to Taiwanese 8 yrs. ago, I’m a taiwanese holder the time of divorce. When the time I’ve decided to re-marry again, I passed All of my papers and process by Phil. Embassy in Taiwan, they sent my necessary docs. to DFA and city hall as well, then after that from city hall they informed my agent that I can re-marry anytime, because i’m not a filipino anymore. but this time i want to petition my filipino husband, they asking me a legal capacity from taiwan embassy, but taiwan embassy did not give me a legal capacity since I’m a filipino. And when i asked my sister to check if my marriage before is null and void, after that,they get a copy of my 1st marriage from nso…so it means my marriage still valid…pls. advice what i’m going to do…

Salie, if the it was your foreign husband who applied for the divorce in Taiwan, you may file a petition for recognition of foreign divorce, otherwise you will have to apply for annulment.

This is just a follow up inquiry. Can I file an annulment even if we are 16 years married for the ground of psychological incapacity? Are drug addict can be a ground of psychological incapacity? I have medico legal last 2003 because I filled a case against him for hitting me. Can I use this as evidence on my annulment case even the case was closed?

How to Find a Philippines Girl, The Safe and Right Way

How to Find a Philippines Girl, The Safe and Right Way

I’ve lived in the Philippines for over Five years.

Natural Philippines beauty also includes it's lovely ladies too

I’ve married a Filipina girl and now have two children, with a third on the way.

In addition to my own experience, I’ve also watched dozens of relationships between Filipina girls and Western men unfold.

I’ve seen many wonderful relationships form, as well as relationships that have crashed and burned. I have many pieces of advice that can help you find the right girl, if you’re interested in a relationship with a Pinay girl.

The following experiences I’m going to share with you may shock you enough to make you think twice about finding a Filipina girl.

However, be aware that you can avoid these pitfalls with the right advice.

I’ll give you the pointers you need to avoid these traps later in the article.

Even when things go really well, some things can go very wrong. In my case, there is a very common situation that exists with Filipinas who are looking for foreign men. Many girls do not have access to computers and regular internet connections.

They often will have some older woman pretend to be them in contacting foreigners on their behalf. The older woman’s incentive for doing this?

Yes it's shocking, and it is common. I know of several situations where this was the case, my own included. It is important to take note that in the Filipino mindset, it is not shocking. The girls end up finding a man they wouldn’t have otherwise found.

They appreciate the situation, and don’t mind losing half the money their man sends.

They keep this a secret of course, because their man might not approve.

You’re HOW old?

My wife and I typically will entertain foreigner men who come to date our friends or family. On one such occasion, a Canadian arrived and we all went out to a nearby island. On the boat ride out to the island, the girl and her foreigner were cuddling.

It was a pleasant day at the beach, and then we all headed back.

A few weeks later I heard of an issue they were having. The guy wanted to send her money, but she couldn’t pick it up from Western Union. They were trying to figure out another family member who could receive the money. I asked, why can’t she pick the money up?

The answer: they will only give money if you are 18 or over. Confused, I asked the girl’s age. She was (drum roll) 15 years old.

I asked “Does he know that?” No, he thinks she’s 18. Luckily, nothing happened to him. However, this is a very serious thing. Go watch a few episodes of “Locked Up Abroad” on Discovery Channel and find one that features a Philippines jail if the previous story doesn’t raise the hair on the back of your neck.

If a girl happens to be younger than that and wants to sign up anyways – they will. Many Filipino families would be thrilled to pawn off their 15 year old daughter to speed up her becoming the goose that lays golden eggs. I’m aware of many instances of underage girls looking for guys. It is a common enough occurrence to warrant being extra careful if a girl’s profile says “18”.

In addition, think of how silly you would feel if you visited a girl, went back home and started processing paperwork to bring her home, and at the last moment it all falls apart because she lied about her age.

There are a very high percentage of Filipina girls who are lesbians that pursue men online – for no other purpose than to milk them for money.

Moral of the story: Don't get caught with your pants down with the wrong type of Filipina girls

From my experience, I’ve seen this destroy a few men’s lives. A large group of lesbians I’m aware of through family relations all have profiles online. When one of the girls gets a guy to send money, the group of them go partying at the local disco.

In one case I’m aware of, a guy from California came here to marry a girl.

Up until that point, the man was being used for money. After he arrived to marry her, her family put enormous pressure on her to get married. They would receive a lot of money if she married a foreigner. She however, didn’t want to – but she did anyways. On their honeymoon, she eloped with her lesbian lover, leaving both her new husband and her family behind. He stayed in the Philippines longer to work the situation out, spending all of his money.

Since then I’ve kept my eye on this girl’s attempts to scam and have rescued another guy from her clutches before it was too late.

This is just one of a few lesbian horror stories I could share.

There is no better career available to a young girl than to hook a foreigner man.

Average wages over here for an inexperienced young girl may be $100 USD per month for a full time job. If you send her $400, that may seem like “not much” to you, but to them it is four month’s salary for doing nothing. If she can float 3 other guys just like you, then she just made a full year’s salary for doing nothing more than pretending she likes you a few hours here-and-there. It is a tempting situation for girls who are not actually serious in finding a man and don’t have much of a conscience.

For that matter, married women or girls with boyfriends also scam men, with no intention of leaving their Filipino men.

There are countless situations that could unfold which place you in a situation of being used. However, if you do due diligence, you can find a Filipina girl that makes everything worth while.

Not all Filipina girls are bad news.

A disproportionate amount of girls on dating websites are scammers. In regular Philippines society, they are much fewer. In a bit I will explain how to stay away from the bad apples. In the meantime, let me explain a few things about Filipina girls as wives.

It is quite common for a foreigner to be from 15 to 30 years older than her Filipina girl.

You may find yourself asking, is that normal? At first, I wouldn’t believe it was possible. However, from all I’ve seen and experienced, this type of age gap is not a deal breaker. I won’t go so far as to say it doesn’t matter, though. In a very real, practical sense – you are bringing things to the table, and the girl is bringing things to the table.

She is bringing her youth, beauty and dedication to being a good wife or girlfriend.

You are bringing stability and providing a lifestyle above and beyond she would ever experience if she settled on most Filipino men. It would be infinitely naive to think that a Filipina girl who is 15 to 30 years younger than you would consider it equitable if you are unable to provide either stability or an improvement in lifestyle.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not painting all Filipina girls out to be gold diggers.

However, you need to be a provider. Her family will need a little assistance now and then. She may want children, and have them go to college. She may wish to go to college herself. This is your responsibility (not only in their opinion, but in mine as well). If you are barely making ends meet as-is, you have no business looking for a Filipina girl – it will not end well.

So in answering this question about age: Will a Filipina girl truly love you even if you are 15 to 30 years older?

If you are bringing what you are supposed to bring to the table, she will have no issues bringing what she needs to as well.

If you find yourself an 18 to 20 year old, you are then dealing with an 18 to 20 year old girl’s mentality. If you are 50, that mentality is going to be enormously different than your own on many issues. This is not exclusively a Filipina issue. Any 20 year old girl you find from any nationality would have the same maturity issues. The older of a girl you find, the more likely she is to be more mature.

The Filipino society is very conservative. Girls here desire traditional families. It is certainly ok for a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman.

One of the best reasons to find a Filipina girl (at least in my opinion), is that relations with the right girl are permanent.

It is not in their mindset that once married, that finding another man is even an option. It is NOT an option. People go to jail in the Philippines for adultery.

Recently I was reading about a story of a Brit who went into hiding, and had to bribe his way out of the country, in order to avoid a seven year jail sentence because the woman he slept with was already married.

Then perhaps a Filipina girl isn’t for you. Personally, I think it is one of their best traits.

By following these rules, you can limit your risk and avoid many potential problems.

First of all, do not contact any Filipina girls until you’ve set the date you can come to the Philippines.

No longer than two months.

Once you know the date you can come, join any of the many romance websites that have Filipinas. They will contact you. When I joined, I received around 150 contacts the first week.

This next part will be hard, but you HAVE to do it!

Do NOT become romantically involved with any of them.

You will let these girls know you’re looking for a girlfriend or wife. However, you will say you cannot become romantically involved with someone you have never met.

They must know when you come to the Philippines that you will be meeting her, as well as many other girls. She will not become jealous or think that’s weird, because you are only friends with her!

Tell her that you will select your girl after meeting with them in person.

  • They won’t ask for or expect money.
    • Why would they get money from you when they are just a friend, and you are considering many other girls?
  • This works for you psychologically.
    • If they realize they have competition to win you, they consider you more appealing.
  • They behave.
    • They haven’t “won” you yet.
    • It teaches a girl to not be spoiled or think they can get away with anything, and it works in your favor.
  • You can’t be scammed if you don’t send money.
    • If they are only out for money, they will be less likely to keep up a charade if they know they won’t get any.
  • When you are in “friend looking for a wife” mode, you can get away with stuff that is much more difficult than when you’re already committed.
    • You can be nonchalant about asking for her birth certificate, or to prove any particular thing, without seeming distrusting. “I’m sorry, this is a list of things I have to ask all girls.
    • Every girl I’m meeting has to answer these questions.” This way you are not singling her out in mistrust.
  • It is ok to exclude a girl and being wrong for doing so.
    • You don’t have to prove your gut instincts!
    • If she looks a little too preoccupied while chatting with her, it doesn’t matter if she’s chatting with other guys or other girl friends of hers – if it makes you feel uncomfortable, move on to the next girl.
    • Filipina girls wanting foreign men outweigh foreign men wanting Filipina’s many times over, you have a large selection and can afford to be extra picky.

Now, while these girls are your friend, here are the red flags you need to be looking out for. These red flags disqualify them, if they do these things then forget them and move on to the next girl!

  1. They won’t introduce you to many friends or family. Filipina girls have HUGE families. If after talking with them for a week or two, you’ve only heard of one, two or none of them – this is a red flag. If they won’t introduce you to their family, perhaps they are hiding their activities from their family. The only reason they would do that is if they are scamming guys.
  2. If you catch them in a lie. Any lie, big or small, is enough to disqualify a girl.
  3. Be on the lookout for anything fishy. If you’re chatting with her online and she suddenly has to go with no explanation (perhaps another guy came online she needs to talk to). Trust your gut instinct every time.

  • Do you not want to have children?
    • Mention it to the girl before you get serious.
    • Ask if it is ok.
  • Do it before you’re romantically involved.
  • Do you want to live in the US?
  • Move to the Philippines?
  • Be a traveling vagabond?

Discuss sex expectation, not in a dirty way but in a “After we are in a committed relationship, married, etc. … I think we should have sex this often, what is your opinion?

What about when you’re pregnant (if you decide to have children)?

Have it all in writing, and discuss it with each girl. These types of discussions are far easier to have before you are romantically involved.

The reason you do this is because they are mostly all pretty. Pretty faces are easy to fall in love with. However, once that novelty wears off, you have to deal with this girl’s temperament and habits. Some of the advice I recommended above, I didn’t do (I sent money). However, having my list of important things and discussing it with each girl is one of the things I did do – and I’m so glad I did.

Living in the Philippines has been an awesome experience.

I may write another huge article explaining my move to the Philippines, how my career changed and how I make money living here.

Nice to see you made it this far so here’s what you can do next:

  • Would you like more articles on living in the Philippines?
  • What’s one thing you learnt from my real life experiences?
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And thanks for reading too – Let us know your thoughts in the comments.

One of the websites I market is Vibrator Gifts. Its a sex toys website where I have various adult products reviewed. Adult marketing is one of the many types of businesses I engage in. I also do website design, PHP programming and web automation. Thanks for reading!

It’s a good article. I have dated several filipinas, ranging in age from 19 to 33. They were all absolutely stunningly beautiful women, ranging from 77 lbs to 92 lbs with perfect long black hair. Tiny sexy beauties, all.

The educational system there is very poor, so you’re not getting a girl who is nearly as up to speed on life as someone in the USA. But they sure are sweet. There’s something crazy good about it.

The point is well taken about underage girls. I was contacted on a dating site by a girl who claimed to be 18. We really hit it off, so I arranged to make a visit to her family. Turned out she was only 17. I still visited them, and she was lovely, but it’s imperative to keep it totally platonic and for the love of God have someone else with you. I found it very stressful because I thought I was going to be thrown in jail, even though her parents were all for it. Made a young pretty friend, nothing more.

@David.Your little lady is over the “age of consent” in the Philippines. The age for marriage is 18. If you are a wealthy whitey who wants to marry their daughter, and give them lots of beautiful mestizo grandkids, they will encourage you, to bed and wed her.

One thing to remember though. If you are very well equipped, which they like, but are usually so tiny you have to be very careful with them – for years sometimes, your performance in bed will be known by all her girlfriends, right down to the last little detail. (and I mean every detail The bigger you are, gives her “bragging rights” over all her girlfriends. So, if you are introduced to one of her friends, and her eyes stray down, and then she starts giggling, you will know why. The problem can be, that one or more of her girlfriends may keep trying to seduce you, because your lady’s description of your abilities has turned them on. In that case, let your lady know, and usually she will solve the problem. Although the method, may surprise, or even embarrass you.

Hi everyone. Filipino women are like all women around the world are a wide variety of types. I am sure that you can find a good Filipino woman if you are looking in the right places & when you have luck on your side.

First look at your self why do you wish to date a Filipino. Are you a good man that only wants one lady. A good Filipino lady will give you their mind & body. They love deeply. Romance & your love is all they want.

Western men have much to learn about Filipino ladies personality & traits. They are very emotional loving & caring people.

When a Filipino woman loves you she will give herself freely & passionately. Be her man. Never cheat on her. She will want to have your babies. They are incredible mothers. They are also great wives & partners.

Hello!! It’s good of you to have this for us who are truly interested In a serious relationship with a Philippino woman. Thanks. My situation is this. I’ve been talking a Philippino woman for about 6 month’s now and she?? SEEMS to be genuine. We Skype alot, she has never asked me for money. Not ONCE since we’ve been talking. But other things concern me. 1. I know sometimes Philippino women act a little childish at times. Making silly faces just doing little silly things when you are asking the if they can be serious for just one moment. I don’t know if is a culture thing because I find that alot of other Asian women do this also. 2. Like I said we Skype alot but l Have never see her family other than maybe a couple of kids running around in which she says is her niece’s or nephew’s. I’ve never talk to her mom or dad on SKYPE or never have I seen them in the 6 month’s that I have been taking to he except sleeping on the floor in the background. 3. She has two phones in which I know that some Philippino women do. She tells me that the other phone is just for ??emailing only. Every so often we will be skyping and she will have the other phone glancing at it 4. Out of the blue we will be skyping and she will make up an silly excuse to get mad and then want to hang up. And what’s so strange are the things she gets mad at are the things that she comes up with to get mad at. Like the silly face thing I mention before. Like one day when were Skyping she made a certain silly face and I made one back as usual. She gets mad, says that I’m not being serious and hangs up. WT**** is going on here?? After 6 month’s of doing this to me now you want to get mad at ??me. I’ve had my suspicions from time to time that she’s talking to other guys or another guy I don’t know if that’s really the case or not but she acts kind of shady sometimes. I’m not saying she’s doing anything wrong but sometimes I really wonder if it’s the culture thing of alot of Philippino women acting childish and immature and I know that something if you’re going to dating a Filipino Female sometimes you are going to have to deal with but I’m also wondering does it have to do with something else like her talking to other guys and maybe getting mad at them and taking it out on me. I would appreciate your or any of the other blogger’s thoughts. Thanks!! Astro’s World Series Champions!! Go Stro’s. Lol

1. Believe nothing you see or hear on the internet.

2. Search her name. She could be several different women, using the same name, used by a scammer.

4. Go over and meet her personally.

5. If you don’t get to meet the family, you are being played.

This lady sounds like a player to me. Ask yourself one question: Could you live with someone who goes on like this? NO? Then why are you persisting? Are you that desperate?. I saved one of the blokes at the Townhouses I used to manage. I warned him, and he got offended. BUT! I must have sowed the seeds of doubt in his mind, so he checked up. He was being played. His case was classic. How could any adult human imagine he is in love with a lady, whom he has only met on the internet?

I will give an example. Even I nearly got conned. (not romantically) This lady appeared on a PNG forum, where we corresponded in Motuan, Tokpisin, and English. She purported to be a black lady in the USA – an accountant. She suggested we set up a fund for education of PNG kids. (Education, even Primary School, is neither free nor compulsory in PNG). Anyhow, a couple of very little things caused me to check her bona fides. She must have researched me well, for I used to be one of the sponsors of the PNG Day celebrations in Brissie. So she figured I had enough money to make it worth conning. Search: Hazina Samuel Doe. So if someone like me, with 30 years of professional experience in the computer industry can almost be conned,so can anyone. BTW. she is probably some scammers alter egos. A search shows her, as half a dozen horny looking black ladies.

I think Marum is right. The person you are in communication does not want you to be part of her life. A Filipino lady in love with you will want you to communicate with her family. They know you are in a relationship with your girlfriend. They will often chat with you & call you uncle. A lady in love shows it in many ways. I wish you luck in finding a lady that loves you. When a Filipina truly loves you will know. Do not think of marrying live with your partner first. Filipina ladies are very romantic.

i had good experience in AbuDhabi when I have no

card for bus ,one philipino young lad y gave her card to me and when I tried to give her Deram local currency

she said no.she even donnt expected her card to be returned.i thank that lady.

so one has to understand phili are good ,one should be individual in deciding about person

@Scott. Te best way to fit in with a culture is to learn the language. (post-haste) The immediately start learning the legends – literature – poetry etc. Don’t waste too much time drinking/socialising with other expats. If something occurs which you are culturally not sure of, ask one of the locals you have come to know. You will earn “brownie points” for asking, rather than just blundering on. Maybe I am somewhat of a chameleon, but I always seem to easily fit in and feel at home wherever I am. It may be like my attitude to food, I never prejudge. I just clear my mind, try it, then evaluate it on its merits. If you and your lady really love each other, then learning the different cultural expectations each other has, is hilarious, and great fun. And even better, with my lady and I, it used to end up in a mock fight on the floor, or whatever, and subsequently a wild lovemaking session. For instance: When I was young, in Aust rice was normally a desert, only ever with curry as a main course. So. My lady cooked me a beautiful meal. As she was going to take the rice away at the end, I put some rice in a bowl, then put ice-cream and honey on it. She looked at me in horror and said: “OH! YOU AUSTRALIANS DO STRANGE THINGS!” I replied, “You think that is strange?” wrestled to the floor, took most of her clothes off, spread the rice honey and ice-cream on her tummy, and slurped it off, with her squeaking squealing and giggling. So you see. Instead of either of us being a little miffed, it became a fun game, and an hilarious night of lovemaking for both of us. (Who said: It is the most fun one can have without laughing?)

As I said, do not spend too much time hanging around with other expats, aside from asking initial advice, from then on, ask locals. EXPAT COMMUNITIES ARE CARICATURES OF THEMSELVES. If you don’t believe me, look at the Greek community in Melbourne, (which incidentally is the second largest Greek city in the world after Athens) or the Aussie expats in PNG. Above all ; Expect difference, enjoy it, allow yourself to change, and have fun.

BTW. I am retiring to the Philippines shortly myself, I am 73yo. But I will not be looking for a woman. Just somewhere quiet near the water. I have the intellectual honesty to admit, there is no way that I could keep it up to a young lady with a normal young lady’s needs. (Both in, and out, of bed) I should know, because when I was 17, a Filipina lady and I, had each other as our first lovers. We wanted to marry and have lots of kids, but our respective parents prevented that. She was the most sexy beautiful lady I have ever had. The only problem was, that she was physically so tiny, compared to me, I had to be so very careful with her. But she was well worth it. What a lover . She made me so glad to be a man. ROLF. She reckoned I was beautiful too. Aside from being extremely fit and muscular etc., I cannot imagine where she got that notion from. 💑

Hi Marum A 73 year old man. Would usually not be able to cope with a young healthy woman. I am 62 in a relationship with a 41 year old Filipina .My girlfriend looks like a much younger woman. Her body is incredible. She is a Sexy & passionate lady.

I do not look like a old man. I am 6 feet tall. Blue eyes & masculine. Age does not matter if your handsome. It attracts any nationality. A successful confident alpha male are what women search for. I wish you luck in finding a nice lady before you die. Who loves you deeply. All a woman need is a good man. Treat her with respect.

Hi John, I do not think 20 years age disparity too much. However you read what you wanted to. I repeat I am not looking for a lady. I am still married to an Aussie lad, but we are well and truly separated. As I said I want somewhere near a beach where I can do a bit of fishing and surfing, play chess via the net, and perhaps do a bit of writing. Night Clubs and bars have never interested me, even as a young bloke.

At the moment I am starting Tagalog lessons, In my young days most spoke Espanol, but my lady’s dad was Spanish. his family had had plantations there for centuries before WWII. In a while I will travel over and have a look around. I do observe that Tagalog is very Spanish in structure, Hasta luego hombre. Vaya con dios.

EDIT: I am still married to an Aussie LADY. Heavens!

I just read your post and was very encouraged. I am 56 and am engaged to a wonderful Filipina of 36y. I was actually looking for some one in their 40’s but she really ticked all the “value” boxes I was looking for and I figured that if we get a few happy decades together it is more than most people get even if they are close in ages. And we talk and talk and talk, the conversation is really good. And that was one of the values I was looking for.

Also, I am a active weight lifter and kayaker, so I also look a lot younger than my peers, which helps i guess.

But as I said the only thing that worried me was the age difference. So, thanks for sharing.

Like you I enjoy kayaking. I also enjoy many other sports like snow skiing. Enjoying good communication together is a important part of a relationship. I retired early from a career in teaching. I am lucky because my girlfriend is also a Teacher in the Philippines. I live with my partner in the home she owns in the Philippines. As to marriage that is for the future. At the moment we are both happy to be together. I think you should be aware your partner will most likely want children with you. When your partner is in love with you. You will know. I expect your Girlfriend has told you that you are Guapo. Soon you will know what Tampo & lambing is. Filipina women are also jealous & protective of you. I wish you both to have a happy relationship together. Regards John

A lot of our self-centered, western women should see how self-sacrificng many Filipino ladies are. Many young Filipina ladies will willingly work as bar girls, to put their younger siblings through college. An employment where they have drunken,obnoxious westerners pawing all over them.

So old western men delude themselves that the large age difference is acceptable in the Filippines. No mate. Everyone knows what these ladies are up to. But it is a far softer option than outright prostitution.Of course they want your relatively greater wealth. In exchange, they give you an agreeable sexy companion. Fair exchange no? Hopefully, you will be the good Matandang, Mayaman, Madaling, Mamatay., and die leaving them some money and a house. With a little luck, they can accelerate that process, by madly screwing you into a heart-attack. (seems a pretty good way to go to me)

If, in your retirement you wish to do this….OK. Just don’t lie. Especially to yourself

Yes I agree with you it grosses me out. Old men wanting young skirt. A 40 year old Filipino often looks like she is still in her twenties. Yes any woman wants a smart & handsome man as a partner. I do not think that a 23 year old would enjoy sex with 70 year old man. Many women are attracted by me but I am not the average 61 year old man. Most British women are over weight & fat. I would not date a woman of my age in England. It is best to have a partner that helps you keep young & active. Have you seen what a Filipino man looks like when they are 60. I put my profile on many dating sites around the world. How a man looks is very important then you will be contacted by many Beautiful women. I have dated women of many nationalities. The age range was 25 to 46. Ukrainian & Chinese ladies are nice. Yes & young British women. I prefer slim women who are sporty & healthy. I wish you luck in writing your comic book. I can see the idea is good a 70 year old man with stick be dragged around by a Filipino Bimbo to go shopping in a shopping mall. ha ha. What the action is like in the bedroom. Remember Chris the successful relationship between a Western man & a Filipino they remain silent often because they are very happy.

Hi Chris. I am 61 year old White British male. 6 feet tall blue eyes. My girlfriend is a 41 year old Filipino woman. 5 feet 1 inch in height & she is slim & has a incredible figure. I was contacted on the Filipino cupid by my now girlfriend. On my profile I had put my e-mail address. She contacted me & asked me to go on Skype. On Skype the first time we chatted & listened to music together for many hours. Later that evening she sent me a e-mail she said she not only liked me I am sorry I have fallen in love with you at first sight. I thought it was just physical attraction on her part at the time. Now over a year later. My girlfriends feelings have grown even deeper. I was not expecting when I contacted my now girlfriend this situation would happen. We are now lovers. There are good Filipino women on dating sites who are not materialistic.Who would never ask for money. How I got this lucky I do not know. We are living together in the home she owns. All my girlfriend wants is that we live together long term in the Philippines. Not marriage. I think most western women cannot compete when you have a lover like this. She is passionate sexy & sometimes aggressive when love making.She is a school teacher. I am a retired teacher. We have great deal in common. We are both Virgos. I do not look 61. I am fit healthy & masculine. She does not see a old man. She sees her lover. If a woman is in love with you age does not matter. A man had better be faithful with a good Filipino woman. A woman like this is a one man woman.She dislikes all the Filipino men. She is a widow who was married to a Filipino man. Who had many of the bad Filipino male traits.A good woman does not want your money she wants you.

Oh, and one more notation. I thought I read that if a foreigner doesn’t have a lot of money, he has no business dangling a relationship in front of a Filipina. I may have misstated what was said, but a lot of men come here with a fixed income and that is that. Maybe they don’t want to start a business, but just live comfortably. So long as they are up front with their potential girlfriends or fiancees about their financial situation, it shouldn’t dissuade them from moving here. ‘I can afford a nice 3br condo, occasional trips to Manila, and I can probably afford to have a single child I can keep and support through to college (whether I live that long or not), and this is how much money I can probably leave you when I die, to be split with my adult children overseas.’ Whatever it is. Honesty and forthright behavior is important. If your Pinay girlfriend wants three kids, yearly shopping trips to Hong Kong, then time to move on.

Very interesting article. It seems to equable and balanced and practical and certainly not offensive to or degrading to women…at least in my opinion. For the record, I am happily married for nearly 35 years to a Filipina I met in the States, and we have retired here. I am used to seeing the May December relationship in full force and completely understand the tradeoff of money and security vis a vis companionship and sex/love/etc. for the older foreigner. It’s just how it is. I still remain oddly judgmental about old 60+ males hooking up with 20-30 year old Filipinas as just…ugh. A lot of folks on advice sites say that the Filipinas don’t care about age so much, and don’t discern a difference between a 40 year old foreigner and a 65 year old foreigner; I think that is a crap notion as you don’t really see young Filipinas marrying older Filipino men here. It’s just a false belief that allows old guys to think that their Filipina girlfriends would naturally hook up with septuagenarians if they could. Ha. Of COURSE a Filipina…or any woman would prefer a younger, handsome male as a husband. Don’t fool yourselves, is all I’m saying.

Anyway, still a good article. I’m doing research for a comic book tale of a foreign white guy coming to the Philippines looking for love, romance, companionship and easy sex but given that I am happily married, I need to learn how a foreign male would do it. As a consequence, I troll these advice websites. Thanks for the information…very helpful.

Hi Chris. I am 61 year old White British male. 6 feet tall blue eyes. My girlfriend is a 41 year old Filipino woman. 5 feet 1 inch in height & she is slim & has a incredible figure. I was contacted on the Filipino cupid by my now girlfriend. On my profile I had put my e-mail address. She contacted me & asked me to go on Skype. On Skype the first time we chatted & listened to music together for many hours. Later that evening she sent me a e-mail she said she not only liked me I am sorry I have fallen in love with you at first sight. I thought it was just physical attraction on her part at the time. Now over a year later. My girlfriends feelings have grown even deeper. I was not expecting when I contacted my now girlfriend this situation would happen. We are now lovers. There are good Filipino women on dating sites who are not materialistic.Who would never ask for money. How I got this lucky I do not know. We are living together in the home she owns. All my girlfriend wants is that we live together long term in the Philippines. Not marriage. I think most western women cannot compete when you have a lover like this. She is passionate sexy & sometimes aggressive when love making.She is a school teacher. I am a retired teacher. We have great deal in common. We are both Virgos. I do not look 61. I am fit healthy & masculine. She does not see a old man. She sees her lover. If a woman is in love with you age does not matter. A man had better be faithful with a good Filipino woman. A woman like this is a one man woman.She dislikes all the Filipino men. She is a widow who was married to a Filipino man. Who had many of the bad Filipino male traits.A good woman does not want your money she wants you.

Good for you. Not that anyone cares, but a difference of 20 years or so doesn’t bother me. It’s the 70 year old men with the 25 year olds that just kinda grosses me out. Met one 70 year old ex coast guard American who introduced his 23-year-old, fresh-outta-the-barangay girlfriend he was trying to convince to marry him after having known her for two months. Eyeroll, please. This was his second attempt at Filipina marriage, the first having abandoned him when they returned to the States, going TNT there I believe.

I know true love can happen, or at least affection, but these old farts with two ton bellies and in poor health, overweight who think that their young Filipina doesn’t care that they look old and crappy is a major ‘WTF are you thinking, pal? It’s your peso account that scored the deal’ from me.

Yes I agree with you it grosses me out. Old men wanting young skirt. A 40 year old Filipino often looks like she is still in her twenties. Yes any woman wants a smart & handsome man as a partner. I do not think that a 23 year old would enjoy sex with 70 year old man. Many women are attracted by me but I am not the average 61 year old man. Most British women are over weight & fat. I would not date a woman of my age in England. It is best to have a partner that helps you keep young & active. Have you seen what a Filipino man looks like when they are 60. I put my profile on many dating sites around the world. How a man looks is very important then you will be contacted by many Beautiful women. I have dated women of many nationalities. The age range was 25 to 46. Ukrainian & Chinese ladies are nice. Yes & young British women. I prefer slim women who are sporty & healthy. I wish you luck in writing your comic book. I can see the idea is good a 70 year old man with stick be dragged around by a Filipino Bimbo to go shopping in a shopping mall. ha ha. What the action is like in the bedroom. Remember Chris the successful relationship between a Western man & a Filipino they remain silent often because they are very happy.

nice write up, this is a very fun country to visit but you have to make sure you keep thinking with your big head and not the little one, with how cute the girls are that isn’t always easy

thats kind of the same advice for most asian countries ^_^

From a young boy I went out with the best looking girls in my year at school an from the all girls school up the road. I have always had very pretty girls an often thought I’m punching above my weight. Since I have been properly single this last five years an seeing as I have always been attracted to small,slim,petite ,cute-big smile happy go lucky,polite girls… I thought I would look to find myself a Filipino wife.

I’m a single lad of 42, I have a condo, a car, a career, savings an no kids. I’d like to think I’m the finest catch for a Filipino wife of 25

I’m so sad to read your comments about Filipinas. Philippines is one of the poorest country,can you blame them? No! But please not all Filipinas are the same.

I am fully agree with you. Let’s go together to Philippines!

Don’t worry mate. She could never outshine your ego. .You are, no doubt, a “priceless” catch. I hope some skank you pick up, enables you to make the payments on your Pox Doctor’s Porsche.

100% True all they want is money I was with a 53 year old for nearly 2 yrs so i Know what im talking about ,the author and other comments are 100% correct As a white guy never expect the truth no matter what, they pretend to love you , pretend to be very Christian but they even Scam their own families so as a white guy you are ” fair game; and just a Money tree Sad to Say This is the first tine I’ve seen this site + first time I’ve commented

thanks for the comment Michael

while your experience is true for many, I have a few friends myself that have lived in the Philippines for the past 6 years and are exceptionally happy with the same lady.

No matter where you go in this world there is going to be good and bad. The same here in Thailand also, good and bad.

Why white? Are other foreign men excluded from this paradise?

The Philippines is a safe country. Women are very approachable and friendly. However, there might be instances where you’ll meet someone who isn’t the typical Filipina and would grab the chance to fool you. Be careful with this one. Thanks for sharing these tips. You can also do online dating btw which is more safe.

in the phillipines money makes a man look very handsome so be carefull and don’t fall for their scam


Wow….this is an amazing site but, it is so shameful how some foreigners describe Filipino women. I am a Filipina and it hurts me to read some negative comments and what I only advised to all of you guys is don’t show your money to get your girl just show your respect and sincerity everything will follows. Because true love money can’t buy.

Sounds very reasonable, at least it identifies the people you can do without.

And for each of them there is also a good soul worth knowing.

Yrll Lopez, as always it depends on which pond you fish in, if you go in with a pocket full of condoms and a try before you buy mentality, then you will find what you are looking for, at least you will both be on the same page.

I have come across many players and quickly skirt around them, it is amazing how many beautiful sweet quality Filipino woman there are looking for a good man if you look in the right places and think/ behave like a loving decent human being. As for Filipino woman over 40, there are many both beautiful on both the inside as well as the outside.

While you are at it, check out what many of the woman in places like Australia carry on like, many would embarrass aBangkok or Manila bar girl with their values and attitude let alone their size and personal neglect. And while you are at it, go take a long look in the mirror and see what you are offering a decent Filipino woman, you shouldn’t be surprised when you get what you get.

The Filipino woman that I have come in contact leave me in awe, their strength of character, resiliance, dedication to family and the people fortunate enough to be in their circle of love, absolutely amazing, so very rare in western society.

My greatest concern isn’t the woman, but whether I am a strong enough and decent enough man that I don’t disappoint the lady that I marry.

Hi John Why marry. Live with them first. Do not take them away from their family & home country. Like in England now live with your partner first. Then when you are both ready marry. I am living with a Filipino woman who thinks in the same way. Divorce in the Philippines is not easy. Many unhappy men & women due to marrying the wrong one. Think of the romance of living together. Be happy.Marriage will be most likely happen when you have been together for a long period of time. In fact you are married except not having a piece of paper.

Right. Easy to get caught up with fear. But a little caution is wise and we should all be mature enough by now any way.

Thank you …. call man. You read enough of these and it gets a little confusing.

I am retired and have a reasonable income and savings. And I would like to write the last chapter of my life in the Philippines. Currently I’m communicating with someone for the past six months. I’m an optimist and maybe a little foolish as well… For sure LOL

Hi Tony First do not send her any money. Small gifts are fine & cards. Go to the country for a month. Date the lady & be romantic and give her red roses. If your Filipino girl friend is in love with you. You will know. Think about living permanently in the country. Your girlfriend should be educated & working. A career like a teacher. Has she worked abroad before. Be supportive in what she wants to do in her work career. It is likely that your girl friend is younger than you. If your online girlfriend is in her twenties. Then I am sure you are not likely to be equal or likely to have a successful relationship. Enjoy your time in the Philippines. Watch out for scammers. But also look out for a good woman.I wish you success.

@Tony. If you are in your 60s, why worry about romance? Just find yourself somewhere quiet, preferably far from the larger cities. Learn the language and befriend the locals. Immerse yourself in the local culture and activities. If you need a sexual experience from time to time, hire an escort for a night…. Or whatever. Treat her like a lover – not a chattel – she will respond in kind. Woo her, like you’d woo a lover….Make believe is fun, for both of you.

Honestly, if you immerse yourself in the local community, love may unexpectedly come your way. Life has a habit of doing things like that. While you are making other plans, it sneaks up on you and “king-hits” you. BTW. Try to live local style….If you can adapt that is. A bamboo house is fun. Especially if you are into entomology. If you are going to a foreign country – with not prior knowledge or language – with the intent of finding a women, your plan is already flawed, and probably doomed to failure.

Remember the old saying: “They whom the Gods would defeat, they first make mad.”

I think it would be easier to get a girl in any other country rather than in the Phillipines. Oh, so your not looking for a wife? That means that you are not looking for a girl! Eh?! Excuse me?! As you article points out, you have to ask yourself if you want to live in the States, the Philipnes, or just be a Vagabond, because if you are white, and you speak English, you need to tell people ” when you are gong back to America” Irrespective of whether you have never been to the place in your life. Have been here now for quite a few months, but I am not looking for a wife, I take exception to religious extremists who try telling me how to think and how to live my life and if I wanted to give out free drinks to a girl it would be in Thailand, where it is understood what happens next, rather than ” no way, never, I can only ever be your friend. Don’t touch me, buy me a drink”. Lovely country, lovely people, eaitiful scenery, but honestly, getting girls? You. It’s be having a laugh. By the way, girls in Thailand of 18 are quite mature and equate quite well to older men.

I would like peoples thoughts and experiences please. I was working in Manila meet a girl feel in love you know the story.

So adultery is the problem. I read lots about. I know …..

Filipina are like all women. You must be careful. Many Filipina told me strait away that 95 percent are for the money. They claimed that they are that 5 good percent. They lie. They even lie to themselves. Every single one asked after a while for support. I gave them all Western Union money transfer number. The same fake number. So I had chance to revise their pure love when they went mad. Fortunately I am not rich western desperate man and I don’t trough away money. I am ordinary man who can afford everything including vacation in Middle Asia four times a year. Just honest hardworking professional in London coming from ‘Eastern Europe. I came from country similar to Philippines. beautiful, but poor. Actually not that poor because poverty rate for Poland is 5.7 when United Kingdom is 5.5. USA 13.2. Philippines 24. Why Filipina looking for Western guys and why they pull out money from them? Because they lazy to work for 500PHP a day. Its easier to find naive foreigner and pick up money from WU. Also because they can because they are beautiful. By the way they not for long. They natural and looking gorgeous when they young. Hard to find good looking Filipina over 30. Over 40 they look not attractive at all. Look at Thai girls they look like middle twenty Filipina over 40. My observation. Consider that. If you don’t believe look at your girlfriend mother when you go see family. You Filipino beaty will look the same. Summary of everything above is that most of theme are scammers and gold diggers. To be honest its nothing wrong with it. They don’t have a choice. Its survival. For most of them foreigner its the best and only option. If you have been in Philippines in province, not rich hotels and resorts. You will know what I am talking about. When I met my wife I spent two weeks in her family house. Living in very poor conditions. There was not even nice hotel around, not even ATM. Just small barangay in Mindanao, but very nice people. I met my wife when she was in HK working as domestic helper. She bought ticket to Philippines. I bought mine. She actually spend her monthly wage in advance. We met we matched. We spend very nice time together. Before we met I made agreement with her. Financial agreement. Who pays for what etc. It worked. When I got engaged I also made agreement with her parents. Everything was strait forward. I don’t want to tell you details, but as you know I am not rich foreigner so I had to play poker game, but I was honest. I said I want to live in Philippines. I wanted to check if she is with me only for visa.My wife hit the ball back. She said we get married when she finish contract in HK. She wanted to be sure she can support family and it was suggestion that she is for visa :) Few months after we got married in HK. Before we got married we made agreement. I said you come here, but you have to work. We share cost of living together. We spend money for our things together. I don’t mind about your wallet. you don’t care about mine. It works like a charm. She works she send money to family. I work I save my money. We bought two houses in Philippines as investment. She pay for one I pay for another. We rent out so we don’t really pay. My wife takes me for dinner. I take hor for dinner. We buy presents for us. We go out together. We like sport so we do actively spend time. I am good husband. She is good wife. Good Filipina. For how long? I don’t know. No one knows. What I know never trust woman, but be fair to her. love her and she will pay you back. Give your Filipina financial freedom. Don’t give her everything on plate. Treat her like partner in life not maid and slave. More likely you will be happy.

Right, It maybe worth, but thats risky shot, I decided to not mess, I am from most beautiful women country in world, but you know they are “plastic” and what it means fake view of life fake manners everything copied from stars from those idiotic spoilers and thus they got spoiled themselves too grown with them, their parents grew them like sluts so they don’t even think about family here just about sex and fake lies like “you the only i like” the moment they leave your appartment – Tinder on a run at other guy after hour :D so i decided to look for onlne dating found such Philippines nice woman she claims trustworthy and lalala where it’s a chance of 95% that it’s waste of time plus might fake DNA check results even if you set a kid and you might have to support not even your kid :D how you gonna know that? :D only after 10 years when kid will grow and show no signs of fatherly similarities to you… that’s waste of time, I will never ever look at lower level women online, nothing you can count on with trust and honesty, there is no real Jesus here with them – all is just manipulation and cover under that.

Avoid Filipina in serious life. Cambodian and Vietnamese girls are much better, even they don’t speak English. When Filipina reach 40 years old, simply look ugly. See Thai 40 years old woman. They look much better. Look at your Filipina mother when you go there. This is your future wife if you desperate to get married. Filipino girls are only good for fun when they young. Go there only for fun. You have more fun in Philippines. Play role man looking for wife. Date online many girls. Meet them fuck them and fly away. Never trust Filipina and Filipino people. Stay away from any connections. Philippines are beautiful. Unfortunately people there are fake. All about money and using foreigners. They lazy, useless. Even if you give them job, they will not work. Simply. All truth about Philippines. I had deferent point of view before. Unfortunately I was in Philippines many times. I had many girlfriends, I was going to marry one. I really wanted to. Everything comes to one point. Have a more fun in Philippines.

I am Filipina. I do agree with you when it comes to laziness. Using men for money agree that 80% are for money. TheI view in life is to stay home and spend money. Most of them are uneducated women who do those type of things. Most educated Filipinas are entrepreneurs. I have friend. She is very beautiful even at the age of 35 she looks as if she is 15 years old. She dated men thinking that her beauty nails and looks will last. I am educated,and I tried very hard to help her out to become like me (business minded). She always refused to help me start a business. She likes luxury cars. I have those high end exotic cars. I want to get her one,but how she can pay it? I wish she can use her beauty for business I good way. She thinks that her beauty will last. I advised her several times. Unfortunately, she doesn’t care. I will be sorry for her in the future. What can I say. I am willing to pay for her schooling so she can improve. I find most Filipino people to be employees only. It’s rare for most of us Filipino to become a business minded. They like to show up nice purse,gold,and etc. They don’t even have means. Again this is based on my observations and experience with my own people. They’re not ambitious people most of us.They’ll rather work for $2000-6000 pay check a month here in America.

Kamusta ka, beautiful lady. To be satisfied with one’s lot is not necessarily laziness, but it can be. This is what we whiteys like about Filipina ladies, they are usually so uncomplicated. Honesty, many of them are LBFMs. I do not mean that in the snide derogatory way most westerners do, but as a mark of honour. I have never known other ladies who are so “always up for it”, and so good at it. What great lovers. We men are really simple creatures, Feed us well, and f–k us well and we will never leave. The few that do are not worth considering. Unfortunately, this appears to be beneath the dignity of western women. My lady wanted nothing more, than my total and unconditional love. Those of her friends who had Aussie BFs were precisely the same. Men really do not want women who come with a lot of baggage, and strange psyches. ie; The Aussie lady I married, really did not enjoy being a female, and was a control-freak. You may not believe this: But she would only ever have sex in one position only, would only do it once a night, and never in over 40 years gave me oral sex, even though I always did it for her. What a difference to my filipina lady. She used to quite embarrass me with what she said and her eagerness to “eat me all up” as she put it. She was a lover beyond my wildest dreams, and in return I did the very best I could for her. She was never reluctant to tell me what she wanted, or what she enjoyed most. All we ever wanted to do, was marry for ever, and have lots of children. Unfortunately that was not to be. Parents of course, as I have said in my other postings. How much different both our lives would have been, had that happened. One can only dream. Her commitment to marriage was unbelievable too. She told me one night, that when we were married, even if I beat her, she would still always be my wife. I kissed her all over, and assured her I would never do that. Hell! I could not even bring myself to spank her, even when she asked for it. I was too conscious of her little soft brown bum, and my big hard hands from competition weight-lifting. I would rather kiss it, than hit it. I never did hit to my Aussie lady either. So I hope you are pleased to learn, that not all of us whiteys are users and abusers either.

BTW. I hope my poor attempts at Tagalog, are no too lousy.. I am just starting to learn the language. I my day nearly everyone spoke Espanol. My ladies dad was Spanish. In those days, it was not done, for a well bred Asian lady from a good Asian family, to go out with western men.


This is too late response. So have you finally met her in person? How did it go?:)

Just to clear up some bad information regarding statutory rape laws in the Philippines…

The age of consent in just 12. However, the minimum for marriage is 18 through 20 only with parental consent. No marriage under 18.

I came onto this site because I was curious about this type of arrangement, because my little brother decided to take a weekend holiday to Manila from Japan. He has always been into Asian women I think, which I have no problem with. I just wanted to say that while you seemed to give sound advice, I will be seeking another article to send my brother for advice because of the degrading mindset of the author, towards the end of the article.

Ask yourself this: If you were poor and we’re struggling for day to day necessities such as food or supplies, and had no way of getting those, wouldn’t you be tempted to try to find a better situation, at any costs to support you and your family? I’m not filipina, but I can attest that there families are close knit and have a strong sense of community, unlike a white, American family. So when you’re going overseas to “save” this young woman from her living conditions, and expect her to willingly marry you under the sole pretense of you having more money, why would you be surprised if she turned out to be materialistic? After all, you sought out that kind of girl.

Anyway, most young women dream of finding a man, in her age group, which she is attracted to, and she falls in love with, to sweep her off her feet. Don’t fool yourself in thinking, for one minute, that if you’re an unattractive, old guy, that a 20 year old girl is going to truly fall in love with you. Rarely, this happens, but when all of you are complaining about your overweight, old, ugly, independent exes back in your home country, take a look in the mirror.

That said, I truly hope my handsome, fit, successful 33 year old brother, finds the woman of his dreams and saves her from becoming some old codge’s housewife-sex slave-toy-babymaker. BTW, if you aren’t successful in finding a Filipina woman and you’re an old, entitled jerk, it’s probably because you have the competition of young, successful men who have caught on to your game. I do know at least 4 guys in my age group(under 35) that have married women from the Philippines.

There is a very specific American word that describes your attitude- an attitude that has become all too prevalent among American women. It’s not entirely your fault, however; you’ve been sold the Marxist lie that is feminism. Oh yeah, the word is “cunt”. If these “cunts” would remove the stick from their ass, perhaps they would find a real man (as opposed to the modern feminized metrosexual fagboy) to fuck them and they would become the women they were intended to be.

You are both correct, in your own way (and from your own point of view), but Matthew…I’m still laughing…I’m not sure how “Marxist” feminism is, but you got most of the rest of it right. The problem is, so did Rachel. There are so many factors to consider in this case that many folks can be correct, as I think you both are. Oh, and Matthew…the “C” word, really? Rachel is just giving her opinion, she’s entitled.

Thank you Gunnar. Matthew using the C word only weakens his case and kind of validates her case. But yes I too see both sides, but mostly hers.

@Rachel: Nailed it :) excellent observation! I wonder if guys ever heard of mass migration to escape poverty, hardships from war? I bet Philippines would too if for example they’re close to Europe. But since they can’t easily travel to other countries to find someone, why not use technology??? If jobs weren’t not soo scarce over there, pinay’s won’t put up with mean foreigners that are much older than they are. I’m not saying there are no bad people in Philippines because there are mean, crazy ones. So avoid those duh!. But there are also many awesome people there as well.

I completely agree with the things you said on your post. :)

I am Pinay,but smart one. I am 42 but I look in my 20’s. I went to school in USA. So I am more educated than those who didn’t. I took Philosophy, Logic,and Psychology,and etc.

Very well said. I’m 26 and have a 31-year-old American boyfriend who I met online and never counted falling in love with. He is wonderful and we are equal partners. I’ve always been fiercely independent and have never asked him for money. We will be celebrating our first anniversary in a week and are getting married.

I have friends who are in happy respectable relationships with Western men as well. I wish your brother luck.

I’m sorry these men had the terrible experience they had, but you can’t come to another country expecting to go things your way when you yourself have some self-serving agenda of your own.

I am currently using Facebook Messenger for video call so I can see how the girl looks like everything around her looks like so surprises here, I haven’t sent any money nor there was any ask for it either, so far it’s been like a month-and-a-half since I’ve met this one girl. the best thing to do for me is to send an invitation letter so she can come to visit me hopefully to stay if not well she can go back

Why wouldn’t you go and visit her in the Philippines and get to know her in her own surrounding? Sounds like a fun and interesting holiday if nothing else

Filipina here. 1 tip i can share to avoid feeding the whole family :) or becoming a God trying to make miracles to solve financial problem of Pinay family, find someone who is professional and earning at least 400$ a month :) and let her work. So that you will only take of your partner and HER to her own family. I think, partners just need to talk, being honest, and knowing priorities. If you dont agree with each other, then look for another lady.

hi I am also going down the track of a Filipino wife, and yes I had heard all the stories about scammers and all the rest I told my girl the truth about what I thought and how the financial situation would be and is, I have not sent any money told her I never would, and that the cost of every thing would be split both ways, which she has agreed to, I am ,of there in 8 weeks for our first visit, it seems protocol is nothing at all, I have to fly in asia which I absolutely hate doing, would nearly rather chew my arm of…and stay at hotel while we get to know each other personally all this is my cost . and if she decides no, I m out of pocket about 3k just on her whim,<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>> so if all goes well I get to see my new partner in her environment, which in my book still puts me in an position of trying to find my way in the dark, ie have stepped on toes, will I wind up in a river for a few hundred bucks, i thnk not, I have found a solution to this her sister is already here in oz, and her brother inlaw travels frequently to laoag so we can go together and I am sure, this will result in a great exchange of views and a clear outcome, I sure don’t want to become a statistic, or a story at the pub ,cheers

Kevin this is an excellent article ..I couldn’t disagree with anything you said. I was fortunate enough to have a childhood friend of mine marry a fillipino. .and they introduced me to a cousin… your reply to the self righteous Ann was spot on. These people deal with death all the time. It’s crazy what they have to deal with. My girl is a province girl but I prefer it that way. My thinking is her values are more in place than a girl raised in Manila. .but that is just my opinion. She is motivated to graduate college not just be a day to day like someone stated. She is going to finish college in the states with me. It is her dream to finish. I am 25 years older. I only had one person tell me how bad I was..I told her that’s because she lives in the states and not the Philippines. .anyway .if just got back and the petition is submitted. .here is hoping for a speedy approval.

Hi.A very interesting site.Just one thing to add.If the girl becomes pregnant then get a DNA.I married this girl who was 6 weeks pregnant .Yes you can guess.A pinoy. do i care? Yes and no.I love this boy who is now 5 years old.Hes my best friend.Thank you all for your input.Most of it i agree with.GOOD LUCK TO ALL.

I just want write down my experience. I was falling in love into a pinay. Hmm, still i blame my self that i didnt brake up a year before…..i was so damn stupid to just look for the beauty outside…

She was following me to Germany, Netherlands, Japan, China…..

After 2 years, i decided to give this relationship up, cos i had enough, enough to be scared when she call me, that she will argue with me…. that she argue, even in .public…

But true is also, she argue about simple stuff…that she made very good.

I be not the kind of person who argue…i rather try to work things out in a normal way…maybe thats wrong if u have a pinay….it look like they need someone who argue back with yelling

After all, we broke up for 3 times in 2 years……(now i think, dont go back to an EX, it will just taste like a worm up food)

Yes i had loved her, but my mind told me, this will not going any better after Merriage….

So, i decided to be single….. BUT. i still think Philippine as well as Asian girls be in average better as Western gils……

so, in 2weeks i am going back to philippines…and i will not look for a girl….it will come in time…its not necessary to look for it….(Gilrs on Dating sides are most just looking for money.

But, i am sure i will have more fun without my Ex in my back…..last time i was in philippine with her, visited her family…even there she get cracy and argue in front of her dad with me(reason, she didnt want to dance)…..her dad told her, she is more worst then her dog……..i tried my best with her 8 month more…..until i had no energy anymore…

After all….i dont blame her, and wish her all the best in her life….. but i assume, she have a psychiatric problem, maybe i was just not intelligent enough to help her. I would say, i was to stupid from the start and hope i have learn my lesson of life….. ;)

i would say, the biggest chance to find a good wife in the philippine is in the province, one, who didnt have experience with foreigner.

Hey to all…, Much luck…. and it is more fun in the Philippine……. i am looking forward to make a motorbike dirty and snorkling in the aquarium

Note: please make all guys who love the philippines, do respect the girls and dont act there like an damn horney white ASS…..

What makes a man who has worked hard all his life, raised a family and secured a future for himself dirty? At 50 years old I’m within 4 years of retirement and plan on divorcing soon. I am 13 years older than my wife but we have simply grown apart and decided to go our own ways after raising 2 children. I’m not looking for a kid but I do find younger women more appealing and more full of life. I always did the right thing by my wife. I hope to find another wife who I may be able to enjoy my retirement years with. If all this make me a dirty old man then so be it.

I so glad I cane across this article, I am 29 and I found a cute Filipina who is very interested in me. We haven’t met in person yet, but I will be going in June to meet here. I have video chatted with her family even her 90 year old grandma. However, she is 18 and when the money came up, she asked me to place it in her mothers name. I did but they could not pick it up, I got it back and she has not asked ever again. After we had a spat, the mother even apologized to me, they haven’t me for money since.

I understand I am to put here through college. But her mother has stressed she would perpher if I lived in their country however, the daughters stated she wants to leave home and return for visits.

We have not talked about kids, or even sex for that matter, which is also due to my own feelings toward the situation. That being, her age. She seems like she wants to marry, even going so far as posting thing on facebook befriending my mother on FB. Her mother asks about my parents all the time. But I’m still worried I might be being scamed.

I am in a similar situation, I am becoming involved with a Filipina, and I want to know if I am being scammed. I do not think I am, but it is hard to tell. But the fact that you have met her family would seem to indicate that you are in a good situation here. Has anything else unfolded since you made this post? I would be curious to know, as it would help me.

This is my humble opinion, but you should meet her in the Philippines, but before that, travel around a bit in the country before you meet her. Also ask yourself why you are meeting a girl so far from where you live? You are young so you have something going for you and against you.

For you is your age, then you should check out the other girls around the country. Against you is your age, meaning you had better be financially stable. If you haven’t met the girl “naturally” then don’t expect them to be patient with you if you have financially difficulties.

They have all the time in the world careful, diligent and do many google image searches. If her fb has you cut out in some ways, look thru her friends and her friends’ may find aliases this way. I was duped for 7 months after literally going thru dozens of scammers! The big sell with her was the posts on fb an talking all the time to her and her family on skype. Pay attention to surroundings..are all her siblings always on a mobile device but she is the only cutie. There are some many subtle tell tale signs..just take your time and remove your heart from the equation. These scammers are taught to get the lonely guy to fall in love and I did, it hurt bad. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone!! All the good scammers never ask for money and when or if you offer, they will say no or even act prideful about it…they know ,most men send money anyway!!

@Marc: very sorry to hear about your bad experience. That was terrible and very mean. You’re advice is good. My personal advice to guys is please don’t rush. Go there as friends and make lots of friends first. Get to know them. Choose good friends not questionable ones, avoid those. Your new friends will help you find good ones. Get to know them first before falling or committing yourself. It’s basically common sense and Have fun!

Kevin, and or anyone else living there with the desire to make a little money and serve a good purpose. I am also looking, joined the dating web sites, I have to say at this point ” WHAT A MESS” seems appropriate, you cant trust any of them, and many articles I have read have excellent points. Kevin, why don’t I come over, bring a little money and we open a PROFESSIONAL business finding decent women for men. Use a good screening process, be a head hunter if you will and serve both the man and woman. Seems to me a professional service benefits everyone, at this point that is what I’m looking for. I thought, ok the thing to do here is ask someone their to find a friend for me, a member of he family next door what better way than have someone there recommend a decent person…. I think I have a new business idea…

Sorry it’s 3 AM and I’m crossed eyed from chatting on the dating sites, I might start drinking if this keeps up….

Filipina here. I’m afraid all of the scams you say are true and a sad proof that we’ve gone down the drain…:(

I’ve been really fascinated at why Western men are coming over to Asian countries to find wives or a girlfriend. Been reading some articles about how Western women can tend to emasculate men and that some women can tend to be overbearing and dominant….yet on some articles some women wonder why they haven’t found the right man for them!

As a woman, I find that sad. All women deserve a partner in life that they can depend on and that they are free to be who they are–not as someone to fit a narrow ideal. Women need to feel that they are fine the way they are and don’t need to overcompensate by being too dominant or too ambitious. Women should stop demanding of their men if they can’t match the demands

I have nothing against foreign older men marrying younger women from my country. As long as the relationship is truly loving and mutual and both are happy, I’m all with that…besides it’s an improvement of my race…:) But I prefer to marry someone younger and stronger as I don’t want to start over again and love another man.

I just have to make a comment after seeing “Anna” behaving so arrogantly. I’m sorry about that. Some Pinays just have too much pride in them.

I came across this article while being curious over Filipinas milking money from Westerners LOL. I have no Filipino blood but is rather Chinese, but I was born, raised and is living in the Philippines currently. But I am shamefully admitting that I’m guilty of the automatic gold-digging mindset whenever I see foreign men, especially Westerners with Filipinas. I can vouch that their are actually a lot of them, but of course, we do have that in other countries as well so it’s just a matter of luck.

I want to correct the $100 average wage though, the $100 average is for those who have low to no education who ends up as salesladies to stores in non-famous malls or delivery personnel for small retail stores. Otherwise, the normal (more of minimum) average wage is around $230/month for your inexperienced young person in a full time job such as an office clerk.

But for those who have gone through college, even from not-so-reputable universities can get their first salary despite being inexperienced to around $300-500 a month. Personal experience.

BTW, bless you for providing a one-stop guide for foreigner men.

I do hope some foreigners would stop degrading the image of the Philippines due to one sad experience with one.

I do hope some foreigners would stop degrading the image of the Philippines due to one sad experience with one.

This sentence saids it all , the blame is always on the foreigner.

‘I do hope Pinays would stop degrading the image of the Philippines due to misbehaving with foreigners’

I never visited Philippines but I think that most tips of this post are useful to find and meet girls of other countries.

Kevin, I have spoken with the girl who is pictured at the beginning of your post or someone representing themselves as her on Date in Asia. Can you tell me who this girl is or how you came to possess the picture.

That’s actually a stock image. If you’ve spoken to someone on a dating site using that pic then I’d suggest you might be being conned

Original author here … like Martin said stock image. Anyone using stock photos as themselves is a bad deal. Every girl in philippines has access to web cams so easy to not be scammed when it comes to knowing what a girl really looks like.

Kevin, I’m 56 and have been to the the Philippines 3 times over 10 years. Thinking of moving there when I retire, whenever that may be, but with some trepidation. I have no kids. Curious, how old are you and are your kids still very young? You look pretty young in the photo with your wife.

I have been to Thailand and Philippines many times…

I am 35, never married before and whether you believe it or not really good looking…

Marrying a Thai or Filipina, in my opinion doomed to be horror story 99 percent of the time…

Just ask yourself, are you really that lucky to be in the remaining 1 percent…

Yes, they are very different than western women…

Maybe they will be honest to you but eventually you begin to hear stories about how poor they are, how hard the life is in their countries…

They are poor and we are lucky just to born in Western countries…

But if you are traveling with a lady, staying at the top resorts, eating drinking whatever you like and at least in my situation you are appropriate in age, do you really want to listen about their huge huge huge families and none of them are capable of taking care of themselves…

Please dont get me wrong, I am not saying they want money from you…

In fact they will never ask for anything if you explain yourself clearly at the beginning…

I never gave anything to any one of them, just told them that I want to spend time together and see what will happen…

It is very hard for us to know exactly when they are lying, when they are telling the truth…

It doesnt mean they are bad people just because they lie sometimes…

But I always find it harder than usual to believe their tears are true,their sadness for your leaving is true…

These are all my opinions, there are good human beings and bad human beings all over the world…

P.S. English is not my native language, please forgive if anything’s wrong in my writing…

Love the Article. I just returned from the Philippines, 1/2015, and have decided to start my research and travels to find a wife. From what I saw it should be no problem. I am sick of American women. Even my foreign girlfriend that has lived here too long is too materialistic. Cant wait to return to the Philippines.

I have some experience in this having married in the Phils and living abroad with my wife. Some observations: It’s hard to generalize about where they are from. I went there to meet several girls but found it easier to relate to the “city” girl than the province one. I was told that the province girls are a better bet, i had bought into that notion that they are prettier, more docile, etc. but after meeting them, I didn’t think they were going to fare so well living out of their country .Yes, the province girls did appear to be easier going, but … don’t you want a girl who can relate to you anyway? The “city” girl also quite possibly has better person skills, a good thing to have. and most of the “bar” girls are actually from the provinces who are trying to make it in the city. All I am saying is don’t believe any of the generalizations – just judge the girl and yes, don’t jump to a rush/rash decision. In the end you’ll make a good choice..

Original author here. I agree with you, actually. Of course, its hard to broadly paint every girl and there are probably many exceptions to the rule. However, there’s some blunt truths that you need to face regardless. Province = poor. Poor = uncultured, uneducated, less motivated to achieve anything other than living day by day. Sometimes, a whole lot of pretty and a whole lack of anything in common.

Girl who grows up in the city probably has a very nice bathroom and knows how to keep it clean. Its expensive living in the city, so she works hard at a conventional job. Perhaps shes gone to college. She will usually be a more well rounded girl all the way around. That will become important when the honeymoon is over you’ll have more in common with a city girl.

Reading this article and the comments just makes me wanna barf! I cannot deny the fact that most of your ‘observations’ are true BUT they’re only true to Filipina women who mostly are poor, living in the province, did not go to college and are bread winners of their family and works as a saleslady, waitress or a bar girl. I bet you that a young urban professional Filipina woman, let say an accountant, nurse or a teacher will not even give a white man in his 50s a second look. She will probably barf coz an old dirty man is trying to hit on her.

I’ll take that bet, Anna and further say you know nothing of Asian culture.

I’m a 56 year old man who now lives in Thailand and a few of my friends of similar age live in the Philippines. We’re also all so-called professional men and not your derogatory classification of ‘old dirty men’.

I’ve only ever dated women who are 30+ years old. You might not understand that many Asian cultures actually see older men in a mature and respectful point of view. Something that Western people might be better served to learn from.

Original author of the article here. You have some misconceptions. There are no “bar ladies” in the province, as there are no foreigners in the province, or those who would pay for their services … bar ladies live in urban centers. They typically don’t get married because it would prevent them from being bar ladies. In general, those who have money, typically want more money.

I realize you can’t get it into your head that a younger girl would want to marry a man 15 to 30 years older. Your opinion is probably extremely common, in fact, I’d bet 99% of people in the US would consider it a horrible, dirty, disgusting thing — and look down on the girl for doing it. Fortunately, I decided to spare my wife the glares and stigma, by staying in the Philippines, where the situation is quite normal. There are huge age differences in native marriages here, it is a common thing.

Maybe that $348 per month is enough so they can marry a Filipino who is younger? Good for that nurse then. There is no child support in the Philippines, and men often leave after a time, without paying child support. I can’t even tell you how often this happens — how many children are born and the guy leaves, here in the Philippines — I’d venture to say its 50% of the time. Being drunk, gambling, fine with leaving kids behind when going gets tough, I hate to portray the entire set of Filipino men out that way … but it is generally assumed that if they find a foreigner, a girl will have a stable, secure life, kids are taken care of and without financial hardships. It is generally assumed that if they go with a filipino guy, it is likely to be the opposite. I’m not being self-important or putting down filipino guys, that’s just the way it is, so girls have to pick their poison.

Picking their poison, if you’re a Filipina girl, pick a dirty old foreigner who will pay for college, pay for kids to go to college, pay hospital bills if kids get sick, provide security … or pick a Filipino man who is far more likely to leave when the going gets tough (and with average wages being $348 for a “professional”, the going gets tough quite often). Fortunately, there are women who aren’t quite so shallow and actually love their dirty old foreigners.

Not to mention, half-western kids are incredibly charismatic. Half the TV shows in the Philippines have actors who are half westerners. Two of my 3 kids are blonde, they’ll have incredible opportunities in life here (all 3 are incredibly handsome). I’m sure that is a strong factor — even if its on a deep, subconscious level girls want to marry a guy with home their kids will considered exceptional. Again, I’m not being self-important — that’s just the way it is.

The gist I took from your post is that old men are dirty and girls with integrity wouldn’t marry for security. That is your opinion, to you its valid. Life is different in different areas of the world though. There is absolutely zero social net in the Philippines. A little girl died across the street from me with dengue fever. Her parents were too ashamed to ask money from me to help, until it was too late. She died at the hospital shortly after she got there. It was a heartbreaking experience. I paid another family for their boy to have his appendix removed. After the operation, they didn’t pay for medicines, considering it too costly. The boy died. Perhaps if you grew up around constant death for lack of a few hundred dollars, you’d consider finding a man who could actually provide for their family. I do take offense at being called “dirty” — my kids have also gotten dengue fever, and other issues have happened, though they were resolved immediately because this “dirty old man” loves his kids and takes care of them.

Anna my girl. You sound like the average western woman. You are as racist as hell about Asian women. When I was young it was, “You just want a slave.” about any man who married an Asian lady. Most western women consider it beneath their dignity to really be nice to their man. Once they have – their house – their car – their family, their man can go and stuff himself, for all they care However if he finds someone more agreeable to be with as a mistress, they are the worst buggers in the world. Example: I was making love to my Aussie wife, (I have posted about her in other postings) I was trying to do my very best for her. (I was renovating the bedroom) Halfway through she said:”You know the ceiling would look better blue. Obviously what I was doing was totally inadequate. After that I gave up on her, and spent much more time at work. At least I got thanks for that, and a bonus at Christmas.

BTW. I was being patronising on purpose. Because you sound like a spoilt child.

you can find a good girl from Phillipine but you should look very careful, there are some good and not good. So good luck with your girl.

I am planning to marry a Filipina now living in Singapore and working as a Domestic helper/Nanny. she is almost 32, never married, I am 69.. I realize what I am bringing to the table as far as stability etc.. I am not rich but retired Military. still actively working as a photographer..

the thing I have noticed about he. She did introduce me to her family, She has never asked for money. I did help her buy a new computer but she fussed and fussed with me until I agreed to let her pay half. I did send some money to her family after the big typhoon. but she limited the amount to only what she could match herself. Once he sister hit me up for money for a school filed trip. I ask her if I should give to her sister. She said absolutely not and said she would scold her sister for coming to me. So I think I have a good one :-)

Hi Ron. Thanks for comment and your wonderful story.

There’s always things to watch with any culture including Filipinas or Thai ladies (where I am now). If you keep a level head, know potentials pitfalls and take things slow and steady, you are bound to eventually stumble across the lady that seems a good fit for you.

And that sounds exactly what you’ve found. From what you said, you have found a good lady who is interested in your well-being and, more importantly, interested in you. Age is not an issue in the Phillipines or Thailand which is fantastic.

Hi i have the same expirience with you after i read thru everything like bad to good or good to bad.. I meet this phillipines girl in this viet social.. so far shes good to me and im good to her.. I cant see her because im in Malaysia and shes there but we do sykpe everydy just to keep our relationship longer and of course forever.. she told me that she is a strong woman working with 2jobs sometimes and i ask her if u not enough money u can ask from me but then she said dont want and she can handle her self.. So i think from this point is that some is golddigger and some is not.. Just that u really have to look for someone who really works hard for their family or who have gone thru a bad times before..

“Many Filipino families would be thrilled to pawn off their 15 year old daughter to speed up her becoming the goose that lays golden eggs” That sounds horrible :( I would hate to see some young girl forced into doing something she doesn’t like.

i am a frequent visitor of Philippines and i am sure that it will help me a lot

Wow. If only finding love and finding a husband is much simpler like this. This (finding a man online) can make things easier, but would be less magical. I agree that Filipino women want to marry foreigners because of the financial stability they can offer though this is kinda embarrassing to admit.

Just an additional tips for foreigners, I think you should look for Filipina women not living in big cities. Most of them have become outgoing and liberated. Women from countryside, rural or small cities are more modest and conservative I guess.

Well, that’s an interesting and long detailed article, Kevin.

While I’m in the US, I do find Filipino women somewhat attractive but is the effort involved really worth the effort?

Is a young Filipino woman really that interested in an older guy? I mean are they really?

I know the older women here in Seattle just seem to be older than their age. Maybe it’s just me wanting to be younger than what my years suggest or wanting to regain some youth that I lost due to working so damn hard in my younger years.

What is your estimation on successful relationships between older Westerner guy with younger Filipino woman … when they use your thoughtful suggestions?

Oh it sure is a marvellous and detailed post, Gary.

Pity the majority of people that have read it are probably a little scared to comment since it is a little bit of a touchy subject i.e. Filipino girls and going after them.

That said, there’s heaps more that Kevin could add to it, I’m sure so I hope he pops back to answer your question.

I am also here out curiosity of different cultures and customs. I am 33 years old and a successful entrepreneur. Also i am well traveled and versed. @Kevin, you gained the knowledge needed and from that you have a informative blog and i respect your willingness to help inform others on your experience and procedures so they can go forth with whatever decision they shall make. Now that being said, theirs always a simple solution to any problems that arises on any country, continent, also in everyday life. I wont mention the condensending and irrational rants which two people commented earlier. It sounds like the two of you had a bad experience and Judging someone elses culture, believes, and the way the survive is why we as westerners are looked down upon by other countries. Its survival of the fittest and every country doesn’t have support like our government supports us. Both of you have at least 15 years my senior on me and it doesn’t seem like either of you have a grasp on life and the way the world works. Advice: stay in the US if the lack of empathy how other cultures survive. One last thing needs to be said. whoever wanted to trade their wife in for someone that is almost a third of your age is not a good investment nor even a good life choice since its seems your grasp on life isn’t logical at this point. Some advice for those that are sincere about finding someone compatable and has the comprehend that we go through several mental changes as we get age, what happens through the years, AND OUR CULTURE develepment of our residence is set up among other critical factors that play in our neurological development. Everyday technology and information is in the pm of your hand. Instead of passing judgement at other cultures use your phone, pc, laptop or whatever you use to bluntly VOICED IN ALL CAPS! Because your pure lack of understanding the simplest form of economics. Instead of educating yourself that is so… Easy today you put down a whole other country just because you don’t understand how and why the way things HAVE to work in the Philippines. From what you yelled earlier obviously your at a point of no resolve… listen, comprehend, understand, and even research the economic background of her home. She will think of you as a more caring and understanding and rational person. @JOE hire a private investigator for a day or two once your mind is clear that shes not playing you, you move to the next thing. It has been a few years so what os the real reason you didn’t set a time and place to meet? Maybe get your mind off just having sex with her then getting her pregnant and after that getting a DNA test and even if the kid isn’t yours you cant get divorced. Stop over thinking things and allow happiness in your mind and body then maybe get on some anti-anxiety medication. Here is my email if you would like to discuss your further options. Its been 2 years buddy. Its time to make a move if you still want to. Ide be happy to give advice and help you.

@Scott. Why bother. After a lifetime in the Engineering trades (electronics and mechanical) I have found that no amount of logical factual data will alter a highly cherished opinion. This is what makes many people incompetent at “fault fixing”. They try to make the fault fit their theory. Now. I realize that humans are very much more complex, but the process is similar.

What most people lack is a sense of humour and curiosity, and the ability to open up to new experiences, and allow yourself to change. If I am confronted by people I have never seen before, (unless they are actively engaged in hurling sharp pointed objects at me) my reaction is always curiosity. eg. How do they live , what do they believe, what are their customs, legends, stories, etc?

For instance: Melanesian time, drives most whiteys crazy. I imagine – even in this day and age – the circadian rhythms of village life render time a concept, rather than an imperative. Ilearned such a lot from my La Filipina, even though we only had two brief years, out of what we both thought would be a lifetime.